How to dress for life outside the bubble
As sophomore summer winds down, we must look ahead to the beginning of junior year -- where fun goes to die.
As sophomore summer winds down, we must look ahead to the beginning of junior year -- where fun goes to die.
So you've only gone to the River three times, and the Copper Mines zero. Where are your fun summer fling(s)? Summer has definitely turned out differently -- much differently -- than many of us thought it would.
To break up or not to break up. This pivotal question haunts many a Dartmouth couple as one or the other (or both) will travel to London on a History FSP this Fall or spend the Winter in New York slaving for Morgan Stanley.
If you ignored my earlier advice to hook up with half of the campus, you may have found yourself with a permanent pong partner (known outside of our bubble as a "boyfriend" or "girlfriend" with whom you go on "dates.") As sophomore summer draws to a close and the junior class scatters to our respective Bridgewater-provided abodes or overpriced student hovels, the question of what to do with this person looms large.
However much you would like to deny it, Summer term is coming to a close. Finals are approaching, the weather's cooling down and Beta alums are busy setting up Betavision 2.0.
To everything there is a season, and at Dartmouth it seems that our years as upperclassmen are the season for getting fat and going insane.
'10 Sigma Delt We just got back from [house on Wheelock Street] where we were like sexually assaulted. '08 Psi U: Um, isn't that why girls go there? '10 Guy Taking the Ledyard Challenge: Yeah, after you swim across the Connecticut River you're supposedly allowed to be nude in Vermont. '10 Girl Geography Major: Yeah, how far is Vermont from the Connecticut River? '10 AD on bus returning from Six Flags: My grundel is just so chafed right now, I can't take it anymore '10 AD 2: Yeah man, you just love your Goldbond '10 AD: First thing when I get home... '10 Psi U: Who would actually want to see a penis anyways? '10 KDE: Um...obviously you havent met my house '10 Sigma Delt: Yeah, sure, I'll put your cigarettes in between my boobs and my baby
I thought about getting an off-campus house once. "It'll be like my parents are gone for the weekend...for the whole term!" I imagined.
Finally! The hundreds of hours I spent watching "Design at Nine" and "Trading Spaces" are justified in the form of a column in the Mirror.
It's Saturday morning. Your head is pounding as you try to recall any parts of last night you can " like how you managed to get back to your off-campus house without getting arrested by H-Po?
Squirrels chewing holes in cereal boxes, one-on-one pong tournaments on any and all weeknights, calling the police to get rid of a bat -- do any of these scenarios sound familiar?
Hey, before you sign a year-long lease to the Love Shack, listen up! Sure, off campus housing may seem sweet, but dude, step back.
Ah, the joys of living off-campus. Paying rent once (or twice) a month, having to clean your shower and take out the trash and being forced to make the long trek to FoCo anytime you want a sandwich. No, but seriously, dishwashing aside, living off-campus is great.
Since there are only 200 people who hang out at Dartmouth, it shouldn't be too hard to make a name for yourself.
What's it like to manage the 30-plus students that in the apartments above Murphy's each term? Mike Iskander, the building manager, shares his thoughts on Dartmouth students. How long have you been a building manager for? Three years now.
'10 Tridelt (while painting a pong paddle): Boys think we're really cute for doing this. '10 Kappa: Oh my god I'm lactating! '10 Transfer student: Please don't lactate on me. Tri-Kap '10 to high school girl in basement: Yo, sorry you have to leave, we can't let high school people in. Girl, as she throws a beer in the guys face: I AM A GROWN ASS BITCH Tri-Kap, as he escorts her out: Too bad, we don't let grown ass bitches in either. '10 girl #1: Did you see that foco poster?
DDS + Sophomore Summer = sad face. How am I expected to live in a world where Foco closes at 10!? That's just honky talk.
We all pretend that when we grow up, we will deactivate our Facebook accounts. I'm willing to bet we won't.
Summer is all about spending as much time outdoors as much as possible. So to help you out, we've scheduled a perfect summer Saturday from sunrise at 5:15 a.m.
Until this summer, I didn't realize how much a little sunshine and a high of 85 could brighten my day.