'08 Psi U 1: I've only written for the The Mirror twice and I already hate it. My next column will be about how I deserve page 3.
'08 Psi U 2: And then there will be a counterpoint.
'11 Girl 1: So, how was your afternoon?
'11 Girl 2: It was fine, until I heard the song I lost my virginity to blasting out of Phi Delt.
'10 guy: I hate having a penis. I just peed in my pants.
'08 Guy: I love middle names. Middle names are my passion. That and infrastructure.
'10 Girl: People have such stereotypes. Like people still think that Chi Gam is sketchy, even though they cleaned up their act years ago.
'11 Girl: Um, no they didn't.
Girl on her cellphone [in Berry stairwell]: I called him three times today and texted him asking him if he was ignoring me.
