Kid [in the Dartmouth Bookstore]: Daddy, does Darth Vader have a brain?
Father: Yes, son, everyone has a brain. Except for Republicans.
'11 Girl: Do you want to know how sexy I am?
'11 Guy: I already know how sexy you --
'11 Girl: I ski, snowboard and tele. That's how sexy I am.
'11 Guy: Wow, I'm kind of embarrassed.
'11 Girl: He and I live close enough so that we can still meet and have sex over the summer.
Guy [loudly talking on a cell phone on the Green]: I mean, I'm not gay or anything. Like, it felt good, but it was just a one-time thing.
'09 Girl [in Collis]: I can't eat the Wheaties, "The Breakfast of Champions," because I'm a loser!
Girl [on cell phone]: Hey mom! How are you? [pause] Good. Are you hungover?
'09 Sig Ep to '09 Girl: Either I like you a lot or I like cobbler a lot because I live in Sig Ep and my first class is in Sudikoff, so Collis is pretty out of my way.
'09 Girl: You used to have crops
'08 Guy: We don't have crops, it's a ranch.
'09 Girl: You used to have yaks.
'08 Guy: That's not a crop.
'09 Girl: If apathy were a cup of hot water, I am a teabag that seeps in the apathy.
