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(01/17/17 3:32am)
Most rules exist for a reason, but there are the golden few that make absolutely no sense. Many frats adhere to strict policies that students don’t understand, and Phi Delt’s mission to only broadcast music that’s more than 20 years old is no exception. It’s assumed that past brothers of Phi Delt don’t exactly want to hear “Beez in the Trap” when they come back to campus on a nostalgic wave, thus alums have enforced this rigid code. Since I live in the Choates, listening to whatever they choose to play outside during the warmer months is something that I am subjected to against my will. Don’t get me wrong, “You Make My Dreams” is a huge bop and anyone who doesn’t have an internal dance party is lying to you.
(01/16/17 6:54pm)
Have you
ever wondered what House you’d be in if the housing system was instead based on
your zodiac sign? Wonder no more — just find your zodiac sign and get sorted!
(01/16/17 5:43pm)
There's only one way to find out.
(01/12/17 6:39pm)
Pump your brakes, ladies and gents,
‘cause Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s five stages of grief model is way out of date.
No, I don’t mean for little things like “deaths in the family” or “fascist
takeovers of society.” This new step-by-step guide is for real issues. Issues that hurt us all. You know of what I speak — it
hangs like a pall of darkness above the campus. It hurts all, consumes all,
destroys all. Of course, I am referring to the decision of Dartmouth Dining
Services to do away with the free and independent napkin dispensers at each
table in its establishments and replace them with centralized, collectivized
napkin dispensers.
(01/12/17 3:00pm)
After that last slurp of eggnog, you probably told yourself that this year was going to be different – that you were going to keep your New Year’s resolution (that’s four years running) of finally getting in shape. But it’s a week into the term and you’ve probably already started to deviate from that rigid training schedule you set for yourself. To be fair, walking to the gym in subzero temperatures when you have a bunch of other stuff on your mind is probably one of the last things anyone wants to do. But I’m here to give you a few tips on how to get back on track because trust me, it will all be worth it.
(01/10/17 9:46pm)
For freshmen experiencing their first New England winter or people who’ve spent most of their lives somewhere that isn’t the inside of a freezer, adjusting to the Hanover tundra can be challenging without the right equipment. However, contrary to popular belief, it is indeed possible to stay warm without blowing a thousand dollars on a Canada Goose jacket (all of which could be used to purchase approximately 80.1 large EBA’s single-topping pizzas). Here’s what you’ll really need to brave the cold:
(11/15/16 7:00pm)
Water you gonna do
about it?
(11/15/16 2:47pm)
Finals and impending doom are upon us. All those readings you left unread and thought you got away with are creeping up on you. Professors are still assigning papers even though you have their final and two others to worry about, not to mention what you’re going to wear for TDXmas.
(11/12/16 6:04pm)
When I found this song, it had 3 views on YouTube, and I have probably (unashamedly) contributed more than half of the current views it now has. It was written by the NH Love Song Warriors, a group that sings of the lovely ladies of Hanover, as well as the women of various New Hampshire and Massachusetts towns and cities.
(11/04/16 3:55pm)
With midterms coming up you may find yourself short on time,
meaning that treks to FoCo, Collis or even into town for food may become few
and far between. Just how will you manage to spend your endless meal swipes (’20s),
or your quickly-declining DBA (everybody else) in the most efficient way
possible? With the ultimate college solution: instant noodles.
(11/04/16 3:27pm)
Life may feel like it’s lost all
meaning now that Homecoming and Halloween have come and gone. What are you
supposed to do now that you’ve completed the quest for the perfect Halloween
costume? Start studying for finals? Yeah, right. As the days start getting
shorter and air starts feeling chillier, it’s important to stay positive and
feel prepared to face the last couple weeks of the term. Check out this list of
ways to cope with everyone’s favorite time of year: the end of the term.
(11/04/16 2:52pm)
’18: “Wiz Khalifa is short for wizard khalifa.”
(11/04/16 2:40pm)
If you’re a ’20, odds are the extent of your Dartmouth
social experience has been bopping around from dorm party to dorm party
scrounging for alcohol. Then, of course, there’s the Heorot highlighter party
and Pop Punk if you were lucky enough to get in, or the North Park/South House
dance party if you were truly desperate. Bright-eyed, not-jaded and with a
whole new social scene opening up to you, you’re probably overwhelmed with
questions:
(11/02/16 6:42pm)
Alums: Now we can say we've golden-treed someone's aunt.
(10/31/16 3:30pm)
Dear old Dartmouth, set a
watch, lest the old traditions fail. What is a more time-honored tradition than
opening up your phone over Homecoming and jamming your fingers into the
keyboard for long enough to send out the poetry that is a drunk text message?
Another tradition: Dartbeat reminding you that a hangover is temporary, but
drunk texts are forever. Here are your best texts from last night from this Homecoming:
(10/31/16 2:30pm)
If you think your fracket just sits behind a couch patiently waiting for you to emerge from the basement, think again. Here’s where it could’ve been while you’ve been playing pong and getting #lit:
(10/28/16 6:55pm)
A step by step guide to see whether you should touch the fire tonight.
(10/28/16 7:00pm)
You can take an alum out of Dartmouth, but you can't take the Dartmouth out of an alum. What type of alum will you be when you return to Hanover for Homecoming?
(10/28/16 7:15pm)
As the classic idiom goes, always wear your heart on your
sleeve, your fanny pack or your onesie. You can tell a lot about a person by his
flair, so what does your favorite item of flair say about you?
(10/26/16 4:49pm)
As a ’20, am I really allowed to categorize other freshmen?
I've heard upperclassmen call us “the worst” (mostly to our faces), been given
looks of disappointment when I ask where Foco is and have been encouraged to “touch
the fire.” I get it, we move in large clumps and are pretty annoying, but what
exactly is it that makes us annoying?
