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(10/11/17 4:40pm)
Friday of Homecoming wouldn't be complete without the bonfire — and Saturday morning wouldn't be complete without reading through the texts that you sent at some point during the previous night. But don't worry, you weren't the only one who felt a bit of shame or regret when you checked GroupMe the day after a #lit night. Without further ado, here is the Dartbeat compilation of the most hilarious, incoherent and occasionally worrisome texts from Homecoming weekend:
(10/05/16 5:59pm)
“Mr. Brightside” is unquestionably the best song to shout-sing in fraternity basements, the Russell Sage rage cage (#rip) or pretty much anywhere else. Dartbeat decided to see what happened if we combined Dartmouth’s favorite 2004 chart-topper with Dartmouth’s favorite pastime. Pop Punk 16F, here we come.
(05/27/16 6:52am)
If you’re a '16, graduation is probably on your mind whether you like it or not. And if you’re a ’19 like me, you’re still reeling from how fast this year has gone by. Regardless, many of you have questions about graduation, so naturally youturn to Google for advice and emotional support.
(05/19/16 6:54am)
This weekend, the Green Key performers are sure to be great — but the people in the crowd will probably be more entertaining. Some students have been preparing for this weekend since the Sunday of last year’s Green Key, and other students are actually townies with hilariously bad, fake Dartmouth IDs. Here are some of the people you’ll see at this weekend’s concerts. Where do you fit in?
(05/16/16 11:36am)
With week eight come some difficult choices: you could study for your midterm, or you could sit on the Green. You could write your essay, or you could sit on the Green. You could struggle through room draw, or you could resign yourself to making a home on the Green.
(05/16/16 11:00am)
One night earlier this year, my roommate and I heard a knock on the door. We opened it to find two drunk freshman guys who proceeded to walk into our room, compliment our room décor and sit on our futon. We had a nice conversation for a while and then they left, disappearing back into the night. I have not seen either of them since.
(05/05/16 8:18am)
Dartmouth Outing Club First-Year Trips is one of Dartmouth’s most cherished traditions. Every year, freshmen are led into the wilderness by slightly older upperclassmen with little but tarps, iodine pills and excessive amounts of Cabot cheese. What could go wrong?
(04/29/16 1:08pm)
It’s a Tuesday night and you’re strolling to Novack, thinking only about which flavor of Odwalla you should buy. As you descend the stairs from first floor Berry you see them: students standing next to tables, carrying clipboards and handing out bumper stickers. They ask you to sign their petition. Buy their bake-sale food. Join their club.The students pull you in with their aggressively cheerful smiles and pointed eye contact. Before you know it, you’ve signed up for three random listservs and bought a baker’s dozen of homemade cupcakes. You wake up the next morning feeling the Bern and wondering what happened to all of your DA$H.
(04/26/16 9:25am)
Dartmouth is a small school. Odds are, if you don’t know someone personally, you’ve at least seen them around campus. Maybe there’s a guy you’ve had two classes with but never talked to, or a girl who is always at KAF at the same time. If you ever finally met each other, what would you say? Here are some hypothetical messages, inspired by the Missed Connections forum on Craigslist, that you might write to one of those ever-present yet always elusive classmates:
(04/18/16 9:00am)
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(04/13/16 5:55pm)
Hosting a prospie is a big responsibility. You have to share your experiences and convince them to come to Dartmouth, all while making sure that they don’t wander off alone into the vast New Hampshire wilderness. Here are some ways to make your prospie feel at home (and to keep from losing them):
(03/31/16 5:14pm)
Donald Trump has come to Dartmouth. He has come, and he will #MakeDartmouthGreatAgain. Dartbeat gained exclusive access to his Dartmouth-specific Twitter account, and you bet your ass we took screenshots:
(03/28/16 1:49pm)
How was your spring break? Maybe you spent the past two weeks vacationing in some tropical destination, Instagramming your #squadgoals and your fresh tan lines. Or maybe you went home, where you scrolled through the aforementioned Instagram posts while waiting for Netflix to auto-play the next “House of Cards” episode. If this spring break did not live up to your expectations (like season four of “House of Cards”), don’t give up yet — there's always summer, when “Orange is the New Black” comes out.
(03/03/16 12:48pm)
Week 9 is a time of mental fragility for many students. Though you probably won’t shave your head or commit arson this week (too soon?), you just might relate to some of these high-profile meltdowns. But don’t worry—if Britney’s hair can grow back, you can survive the rest of 16W.
(02/24/16 11:41am)
Brown University: Faculty members voted to change the name of Fall Weekend holiday to Indigenous People's Day, effective next fall, The Brown Daily Herald reported. The holiday used to be known as Columbus Day, until a 2009 student movement resulted in changing the name to Fall Weekend. This year, protests by student groups and a widely-circulated petition prompted the holiday’s most recent change to Indigenous People's Day.
(02/11/16 6:03pm)
This Sunday will either be a day of romance or a reminder that you're still single. Or--let's be real here--it will be a day of post-Big Weekend recovery. Where do you fit in? Take this quiz to find out!
(02/09/16 1:00pm)
Foco has and always will be a Dartmouth dining enigma. Every time I walk out of Foco, I somehow leave more confused than I was walking in: Why is the froyo machine still broken? What exactly is in the vegan pizza? But the strangest of Foco offerings—the Foco “superfoods”—go largely unnoticed by most meal-swiping students (Hey, 19s!). Most believe that these superfoods, located right above the salad dressings, have amazing nutritional benefits. But how do they taste? This week, Dartbeat took to the test to find out:
(02/02/16 9:50am)
Move over, Kylie Jenner. There’s a new Instagram star in town, and she’s absolutely adorable.
(01/14/16 2:30pm)
LEBANON – A Lebanon patrolman pulled over a driver who allegedly crossed the yellow line, nearly hitting a police car on Dartmouth College Highway. The driver stopped the car and fled into the woods, where he was then found by a Lebanon K9 officer.
(01/06/16 1:39pm)
From the historic halls of Russell Sage to the hamster trails of the Choates, Dartmouth’s first-year housing options have a wide range of appearances and personalities – just like Miss Universe contestants! But, just how would these resident halls stack up in a beauty pageant scholarship program?