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The Dartmouth
August 18, 2026
The Dartmouth
Mirror
Mirror

Should I stay or should I go?

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So now that our intrepid freshmen have officially cemented their place in history as the worst class ever (apparently it's possible to overlook a massive, belligerent mob screaming at you to "touch the fire already") I think it's time to take them to task for another serious fault: excessive friendliness.


The Mirror: Get me out of here
Mirror

Editors' Note

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Catherine Treyz / The Dartmouth While it may be too early to start the countdown to graduation, we can't help but be reminded by our stressed-out peers in business suits, and the always popular "so what are you doing next year?" that, in a few months, we will have to say goodbye to the place we have called home for the past four years. Honestly, we aren't ready to leave.


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Overheards

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'13 Girl : I just really want to hook up with a Yale boy because I wanted to go there. It will be like closure. '10 Sigma Delt: You know you have a problem when you find your thesis notebook in the basement.


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Tales of the Transfers

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Think back to the moment when you signed the enrollment agreement form confirming your decision to come to Dartmouth. I can almost guarantee that, as we signed the next four years of our life away to the College on the Hill, many of us were thinking the same thing: Thank the SAT gods, I will never again have to fill out another Common Application. But, if you think that doing your college applications was a huge pain in your proverbial ass, try having to do it two years in a row. I'm talking, of course, about transfer students: those select few who took a minor detour on their road to Dartmouth. If you're one of those people who is convinced that your senior year of high school was the most competitive admissions year of them all, try this statistic on for size: According to the Office of Institutional Research, Dartmouth's transfer student acceptance rate for fall 2008 was about 6 percent not exactly a picnic. Still, while their journey to Hanover may not have been the smoothest nor the most direct many transfer students interviewed by The Dartmouth this week said that the Big Green has been well worth the wait. "[I wasn't] completely satisfied with how things were [at Tulane]," Natalie Young '10, who transferred to Dartmouth from Tulane University after her freshman year.



Mirror

Ask Miss Muffin Top

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Dear Miss Muffin Top, I really want to go to a sorority semi-formal. How do I score an invitation? Lord of the Dance Dear Michael Flatley, Send a preemptive and unexpected blitz.



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Spotlight: Peter Carini

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Peter Carini, college archivist, can show you Daniel Webster's socks or shards from the goalpost that exuberant fans ripped down when Dartmouth beat Yale in the famous Jinx game of 1935.



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DDS: Serving it up to students

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So I have one bookmark on my iPhone, and it's the Dartmouth Dining Services menu page. You can start judging me, but I'm eating potstickers at Home Plate, so I don't even care.



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Student Staffers

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A commonly known Dartmouth statistic is that about 60 percent of Dartmouth students are involved in Greek life. The number of student employees on campus, however, might be even higher. According to Todd Kilburn, manager of the student employment office, approximately 62 percent, about 2,800 students, are in some way employed by the College.


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Reboot and Rally

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Reboot and Rally is jumping back into the Petri dish this week to conduct a head-to-head body shaver smackdown.


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The Gospel According to Matthew

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An affiliated female student who lost her virginity through sexual assault by a fraternity brother, and then couldn't convince her friends, or herself, that there is anything else to do here but go back to hanging out in his basement. Another affiliated female student, who only remembers "crying a lot, and telling him to please, please stop." A young woman who was date-raped during her freshmen year, tried to press charges but was thwarted, and went into rush hoping to find a support system in a women's society but didn't get a bid. These are your friends.


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Overheards

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'10 Heorot from Long Island: I wish life was like The Sims, and every person from Long Island had a big green diamond floating over their head. '10 Girl: You know you've hit a low point when the highlight of the week is General Tso's chicken night. '12 Girl 1: I don't want to change out of my dress.


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Greetings from... London

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So a girl walks into a bar in London. I mean, a pub. A girl walks into a pub. I mean, a girl tries to walk into a pub while also attempting T9 texting on a foreign phone and ends up walking into a glass door.



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Ask Miss Muffin Top

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Dear Miss Muffin Top, How do you know if you are dating at Dartmouth? Down to Settle Down Dear DTSD, When Miss Muffin Top was a wee cupcake, she would fall asleep listening to the story of how her parents met at Dartmouth at something called a "fraternity formal." At a mythical place called Whaleback Mountain, Miss Muffin Top imagined her mother regally descending a staircase like a Disney princess, with her husband-to-be clutching a glass slipper at the bottom of the stairs.


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Spotlight: Celia Chen '78

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Professor Celia Chen '78 of the biological sciences department has had the gift (or curse) of experiencing two different Dartmouths: the 51-percent female campus we know today, and the male-dominated campus of her undergraduate years.