In Case You Were Wondering
In case you were wondering, the snooze button is a terrible invention that only makes you more tired.
In case you were wondering, the snooze button is a terrible invention that only makes you more tired.
As the oldest and self-proclaimed favorite of my family’s three children, I was the guinea pig while my mom and dad tried their hand at the whole parenting thing. As it turns out, my mom had heard that the other (presumably more learned) mothers had started supplementing their infants’ diets with sweet potatoes for extra nutrition. Perhaps a heavier emphasis should have been placed on the word “supplement,” because they ended up feeding me so many sweet potatoes that I actually turned orange. I repeat — I was the guinea pig. I was back in the hospital two weeks later. Everyone thought I had jaundice.
For as long as we can remember, we’ve been surrounded by rankings. Our dads shouted at the TV when there was an upset (Erin’s about basketball, Marina’s about assorted Russian music awards). We were both bummed when that girl from PE class suddenly removed us from her Top Eight on MySpace. And don’t even get us started on the Neopets games room.
Government professor: Since we have to have inflated grades, I'd rather make you work for them. '14 Girl: I can't concentrate, I can only think about pong. '14 Boy: My hands are sweaty from being on Friendsy. '15 Girl: Walking across campus without a bra is actually really liberating. '17 Boy: Being drunk is weird.
Outrageous fees are part of the college admissions process — it’s no big secret. With preparation books for every standardized test imaginable, application fees that stop you from adding that one last safety school to your list and pricey volumes with oddly specific titles like “The 437.5 Best Colleges in the U.S.” and “100 College Admissions Essays That Really, Truly, Actually, Honestly, Definitely Worked,” it’s impossible to escape the process with your wallet unscathed.
On a winter night my freshman year, I jolted awake from a poorly planned nap crammed between midterm study sessions. With a devastating sense of loss, I realized that my mother was nowhere to be found. I called out to her, my eyes bloodshot, then fell back into bed. I was not in my house in Korea, 6,600 miles away, but rather in my dorm room at Dartmouth, my supposed home away from home.
I couldn’t even tell you the number of times my editors cut out the Dartmouth cliches I used in my first Mirror articles during freshman year. References like #facetime, the weather being unbelievably cold and all forms of “so/too real” were akin to profanity. But for me, these were the easy jokes because as a freshman, I understood them. I could even execute them. And it never occurred to me how little insight they conveyed to the upperclassmen that had heard the punch lines thousands of times before I ever stepped on campus.
Down the Rabbit Hole is a new section of The Mirror that showcases student work from across campus. Submissions of all genres are welcome — please send works of 3,000 words or fewer to mirror@thedartmouth.com. The following, "Alexa" by Taylor Cathcart '15, is a work of fiction.
Over winter break, I spent a few days playing hot potato at the homes of my New England-dwelling friends. Each house and family was different — Shih Tzu puppy versus ornery cat greeting me at the door, scrumptious Indian food versus decadent blueberry muffins made from scratch — but toward the end of the week, I began to realize it wasn’t so much that these families were all different, but that none of them were normal by my standards.
POLAR VORTEX BETA'S BACK: Break out your America gear — probation is over. SNOW SCULPTURE MYSTERY: We are more and more intrigued with every single wooden board that gets placed on this mystery box... DARTMOUTH OLYMPIANS: Did you know that 25 Dartmouth athletes are going for gold at the Sochi Olympics this winter?
In case you were wondering, toothpaste, or what we recognize as toothpaste, was first invented by Washington Sheffield in 1892. Various other tooth-cleaning agents had been used before then, including but not limited to crushed bone, salt, charcoal and pulverized brick.
FRESH SNOW HEATWAVE?I wore a skirt yesterday. It's January. DANCING ACROSSCHINA:Have you seen the video by Jake Gaba '16 yet?
'16 Girl: I can't believe they tried to just stop rush. I mean, isn't that illegal? In the hallway outside the scholar studies offices in the stacks: Does it count for the Dartmouth Seven if I have sex with someone in your office? '14 Girl: I have this lifelong passion of making children's songs out of popular raps. Collis employee when the power went out: Don't worry, DDS can always take your money. '16 Guy: I don't even know this guy, I just hooked up with him. '14 Girl: I have never applauded in an X-hour before.
This week, we took a deeper look at social issues that Dartmouth has confronted (namely, Lohse-pocalypse) and how the College has handled and learned from them. As two juniors (?!) having lived through many less-than-flattering Dartmouth headlines, we have had a lot of time to reflect on our very own social problems and successes.
I remember standing outside my childhood home two years ago, trying desperately to turn some of the anxiety I felt about my transition to college into excitement.
The Israeli-Palestinian conflict has emerged once more a hot topic for the student body, but not all students believe the dialogue surrounding it is a diverse one.
In light of yesterday’s Oscar nominations announcement, The Dartmouth’s resident awards experts, executive editor Michael Riordan ’15 and Mirror editor Erin Landau ’15, ruminated long and hard on who will win, who will be snubbed and who should claim a naked statuette on March 2.
The coming week will mark two years since Lohse published “Telling the Truth,” his op-ed in The Dartmouth that accused Sigma Alpha Epsilon fraternity of widespread hazing and ignited the now-familiar firestorm surrounding Dartmouth’s social scene. The anniversary allows us to reflect on the two-year-long debate. What has changed? What hasn’t changed? Will Dartmouth continue to pursue solutions to hazing issues, or are Lohse and his controversy fading from the forefront of our preoccupations?
Luke's recommendations for getting through winter term.
In our previous column, we were so overjoyed about finally making it back to campus after our nationwide flightmare that we forgot to mention how we got here.