Mirror
Our location in the bustling metropolis of Hanover insulates us from most of the traditional daily threats to our personal safety (last time I checked, there was a higher incidence of moose attacks than of muggings), but the population here, composed of the overwhelmingly type-A student body, introduces some less obvious dangers that stem from rampant multitasking.
At any given time, you could be tagged by an errant highlighter that flew from the sweaty grasp of a girl trying to do her reading on the elliptical, suffer third-degree burns from the strawberry split pea soup spilled by someone barging through the Collis mob while on her cell phone, or fail your class because you conducted 65-minute Blitz sessions for an entire term.
Basically, no one here is able to do just one thing at a time.
This insatiable need to do everything at once means that during Spring term, the Green is mobbed not only by people displaying their possession or lack of athletic talent, but also by the tanning studiers -- also known as those people who still mistakenly believe that it is possible to combine their outdoor relaxation with their chemistry book and be productive on the Green.
This is blatantly impossible.