This week’s Mirror discusses change, and as such, it has been an extremely upsetting few days for me. Few will raise an eyebrow upon learning that I have long counted fear of change among my most fundamental values. For fear of change underpins all the other qualities — particularly my stubbornness and sloth — that I hold dear. I spring from my seat at the thought of switching toothpaste brands. I awaken in cold sweats each Monday morning as I anticipate a tectonic shift in the weekly selection at World View. And — if you are somehow so self-flagellating that you could care to inquire about my personal life — anyone who has ever had the misfortune of knowing me well can attest that I quiver at the slightest glimmer of personal growth.
Take me — half-matured and of mediocre quality — or leave me. I’m the wine you open right away, because aging will do absolutely zilch to improve my condition.
I should note that it was already a miserable week. Recently I had the misfortune of meeting a student whose belief system has been so utterly corrupted — whose very worldview I find utterly anathema to any value framework I have ever encountered. The crime? This person had the gall to approach me with a positive remark regarding this Editor’s Note. Expulsion is the only punishment commensurate with such an offense against taste.
The Dean of the College is, by now, exhausted with my letter-writing campaign to expel this offender, but I refuse to relent. I encourage all those who cherish this College and its history to join me.
My editor’s father, who must have taken paternal pity on my pathetic attempts at scrawling a column each week, also said a nice word about the Notes in recent weeks. In this case, Maria Laskaris, I recommend this person be admitted and then swiftly expelled.
So with that displeasure already weighing on my mind, you can imagine the nightmare that editing an entire magazine devoted to change has been for me. The stories of profound shifts in these pages — of housing reformed, UGAs better trained, an alma mater rendered inclusive — scared the living hell out of me.
Open The Mirror if you dare. You may even be forced to rethink something you had previously taken for granted.
