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The Dartmouth
December 25, 2025 | Latest Issue
The Dartmouth

Vox Clamantis: A Seussian Elegiac

To the Editor:

For over two centuries we've been called "DMS"

It's simple and special and famous, no less.

And what's more it's me, and it's you, and it's us

So I refuse to be silent and not make a fuss.

For a large sum of money, it was forced to depart

From the core of our core and the heart of our heart.

Will big buckets of green really bring us more clout?

They'd say we sold up, but I'd say we sold out.

Now I'm discombobulated, yes I am, yes indeed

Disgruntled and doleful and fully displeased

For alas, this new name is just like a thneed

It's fancy and flashy, but it's not what we need.

William-Bernard Reid-Varley DMS '15