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The Dartmouth
April 8, 2026
The Dartmouth
Opinion
Opinion

Mockery is Not the Answer

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I had a completely different column written for today. It was a satirical piece poking fun at the platforms of a number of the Student Assembly presidential campaigns, and was probably my favorite piece I've written all year.



Opinion

Colbert for SA President

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Having witnessed the farcical antics of this year's Student Assembly, Dartmouth students are treating the upcoming presidential elections with their annual surge of relentless cynicism.


Opinion

Defining Progress

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I have always wanted my own beehive. I think I initially fell in love with the idea as a child when I was taught to simultaneously cherish and fear bees.


Opinion

Vote For Me ... Except Not Really

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It's time to talk Student Assembly. Again. With several candidates vying for student attention, one presidential candidate truly stands out among the competition. While junior Carlos Mejia's risqu spread in The Mirror and Ms. Robinson's seduction of a young Dustin Hoffman were both impressive and fictitious, I have impressed many with my dedication and personal struggle with adversity. As a dedicated student/drinker, my greatest asset is my typicality.



Opinion

Candidate Statement: Ian Tapu

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After exploring the many different facets of Dartmouth as a student and learning about our College's key strengths and weaknesses, I feel that I am in a unique position to offer solutions and a fresh perspective to Student Assembly as vice president.



Opinion

Nova Robinson: Candidate Statement

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Student government at Dartmouth abounds with the potential to positively influence the College experience of all students, but its current structure prevents it from achieving its potential. My plan for concrete change is to turn Student Assembly from a fragmented lobbying body into an organization that oversees and controls the roughly $850,000 of Student Activity fees distributed to student organizations each year.


Opinion

Jaromy Siporen: Candidate Statement

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Student Assembly needs immediate, radical and effective reform. By simply implementing new programs, improving existing services and changing its focus to serve the Dartmouth community, a new student government could bring about a revolution in campus life.





Opinion

Rap, Sexism and Dartmouth

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In a recent op-ed, "Ain't Nuthin' But a Blame Game" (May 2), Michael Kreicher '08 concluded that blaming hip-hop music for the problems of racism, sexism, homophobia and violence in society is a convenient but invalid way to address these very real problems.


Opinion

Vote Siporen for SA change

Jaromy Siporen will be best able to steward Student Assembly in the direction of change. After the Editorial Board privately met with each candidate, it became clear that the ideas in Siporen's platform are the most feasible; his dissatisfaction with Student Assembly's current structure is the most cogent; his understanding of Student Assembly is the most thorough; and his leadership style is the most conducive for successful implementation of his platform. Siporen sees the improvement of students' quality of life as the ultimate objective of Student Assembly and builds his platform on this vision.



Opinion

A nomination for one more armed services alum to profile

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To the Editor: I am sure you have your remaining alumni set for your three-part series ("ROTC alum commands army base in Afghanistan," May 2; "'Adventurous' graduate trains, may head to Iraq," May 1), but on the outside chance you are still researching, look up Mike Lauria '05.


Opinion

SA Platforms: Realism Over Idealism

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After I received several Facebook group invitations just hours after campaigning had officially begun last week, it was clear that the race for next year's Student Assembly leadership was well underway.


Opinion

Ain't Nuthin' But a Blame Game

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Last week, in an event sponsored by the Sexual Assault Awareness Program and the Afro-American Society, a discussion was held concerning the influence of hip-hop music on issues of race, gender, sexuality and violence.