Members of the LGBT community shared personal anecdotes and discussed issues of homophobia, racism and classism at Dartmouth during a student panel called "Talk it Out." The event, a highlight of Pride Week organized by Ashley Afranie-Sakyi '13 and Van Melikian '14, provided a space for discussion among diverse speakers and audience members.
Jay Webster '13 said his experience as a gay student at Dartmouth has been positive. He said he found a sense of community at the College and disagreed with the common misconception that being gay and pledging in a fraternity are mutually exclusive.
Since coming out to his friends and family, being gay has been a point of pride for Webster. Even as the only openly gay member of his fraternity, he has found acceptance in the earnest questions his fraternity brothers ask him.
"For me, it's not that my fraternity saw that I was gay and moved on," Webster said in an interview. "It's an evolving conversation that I am more than happy to have."
Webster shared his experience of coming out to his family while on vacation in the Caribbean Islands, jokingly advising audience members to "tell [your parents] when you have an opportunity to escape from them."
After spending most summers during middle school and high school skiing in Europe and South America, Heather, a member of the Class of 2013, said she found a home at Dartmouth where she dated a girl for the first time.
Heather was apprehensive about sharing the news of her girlfriend with her mother, who had always encouraged her to take "the straight and narrow" path. As time went on, however, Heather's mother came to terms with Heather's sexuality.
A female member of the class of 2013 who declined to be identified by her first name, spoke about facing classism and homophobia on campus. Hailing from a small, conservative town, the student identifies herself as queer or bisexual and has found that she is affected more by classism than homophobia on campus.
"On my off term last year I worked in a cafe where the owner made me change because I was wearing a Dartmouth PRIDE shirt," she said. "He didn't care about my coworkers' PDA with their boyfriends though."
The student emphasized the importance of labels in the coming out process and cautioned listeners to be careful which labels they place on people.
"People don't believe bisexuality is a thing," she said. "They're always trying to tell me how gay I am or should be."
Chris Norman '13 said his experiences have been shaped by the "intersectionality" of many identities.
"My fears about class were intertwined with how race and homosexuality would be perceived," he said. "If I were in a group for every identity I have, I would have no time for academics or work."
Norman said it is important to acknowledge that gender roles are shaped by a variety of factors. After taking two terms off from school and participating in a foreign study program, he said he found "fem-phobia" everywhere.
The final speaker of the night, who requested anonymity, discussed the homophobia she has experienced as part of the black community at Dartmouth. During middle school, she never understood crushes and was bullied when she began "acting gay."
"For years prior to Dartmouth people told me I didn't act straight enough or gay enough or black enough or this enough or that enough," she said.
The student faced negative comments on her sexuality from the black community at Dartmouth, where she said there exists a sense of invisible homophobia, but has found her members of her sorority to be supportive.
"My identity as a lesbian didn't mean anything more to them than if I had said I have brown eyes," she said.
Melikian, who organized the event, said it was powerful and he hopes it continues to occur annually.
"Because institutional memory is so short, everything can just vanish at the drop of a hat," he said. "I don't want that to happen with this event."
Prior to the discussion, Dean of the College Charlotte Johnson made opening remarks about how issues of racism, classism and sexuality are all inter-related.
"We are all anchored in the same humanity," she said. "For me, that means being able to talk about our own specific communities and issues."
Webster is a former member of The Dartmouth Senior Staff.
