It is official. The Student Assembly is the most worthless organization on campus. However, considering the oh-so-juicy expos on the rebel faction led by former Academic Committee Chair Adam Shpeen '07, the weak defense of his presidency by our President Tim Andreadis '07, and Andreadis' secret manifesto calling for a frat-free world, our worthless and lame Assembly hasn't been this terrible since, well, about 1769.
Flashback to two years ago when Assembly President Julia Hildreth '05 got funding to buy new BlitzMail terminals for the school. But Hildreth thought that a surprise was in order; Hildreth's purchase had to be a secret so that everyone would be ecstatic when the sparkling new computers suddenly appeared. Then the secret was leaked by Brian Martin '06. When Hildreth found out about the leak, she flipped out, cried, called an emergency meeting, threw a hissy fit and expelled Martin from the Assembly.
In the present we have a similar story. Our tattletale president reported his lieutenant, Shpeen, for an alcohol violation, and Shpeen, in turn, tried to stab Andreadis in the back.
The self-aggrandizing and asinine politicking associated with the Assembly is based on the false premise that the student body actually cares who is in charge of the small and cumbersome gears that make the Assembly function.
We didn't care when Martin leaked the new computer secret. It was, "Thanks for the computers, Julia! The new computers are great. But we would have always known they didn't come from Santa Clause."
In the same way, we don't care about petty squabbles of today's Assembly. The spat between Shpeen and Andreadis is nowhere near as interesting as Lindsay Lohan going into rehab.
Yes, the Solidarity Against Hatred rally was great. We all hate hatred. We all love diversity. But what was this rally other than an overblown, feel-good parade in celebration of values that the majority of campus already supports? The Student Assembly cannot really hang its hat on the rally as a great accomplishment. Larry from Food Court could have organized a similar rally entitled "Diversity equals Fro-yo" that would have had twice as many people show up.
Regarding Andreadis' manifesto against the fraternity system here at Dartmouth, he is entitled to his opinion, but he does not have the authority to speak for the student body on this issue. He did not run on the platform of weakening or destroying the fraternity system. He simply does not have a mandate to write about such a controversial topic without having a majority of the student body behind it.
To be anti-Greek is akin to political suicide here at Dartmouth and to speak out against frats as Assembly president after the fact is devious to say the least. I agree that there are numerous flaws in the fraternity system, flaws that can be addressed symptomatically; but for an Assembly president to actively work against the fraternity system as a whole, he must have been an anti-fraternity candidate first.
Andreadis: As a student body, we have always liked tangible results and programs. The Dartmouth ran an editorial regarding the Assembly's dying student evaluation program ("SA Course Guide Falls by the Wayside," Jan. 12). Fix it. We like vending machines in buildings that take DASH. Get more. A 24-hour library or gym would be tremendous. Do it. Chicken cordon bleu at the Hop every single day. Do it for me. Get us results that will earn you the right to put the words "Student Body President" on your resume, sir.
