What would you say if you found out that for $5 extra, someone could go directly to the front of the grill line in Food Court? Such an arrangement might be called "Premium Service."
Just tell Harold or Chey that you have enrolled in the "Premium Service Dining Plan" and they make sure that your buffalo chicken is done before anything else. Wow, if you had the money, that might be a convenient arrangement. But no such "Premium Service" could exist at Dartmouth. What, then, are we to make of the "Premium Service" offered by the repair shop at the Kiewit Computation Center?
There are two lines, or "queues" as they like to call them, for service in the repair shop. One queue is for normal service, while the other is for the much faster moving "Premium Service."
I am not making this up. I first learned about this when I brought my broken computer to the repair shop at the beginning of the term. Nearly a month later, it was repaired. Did everyone have to wait that long for service? When I picked my computer up, the man working the window mentioned something about the "Premium Service" option.
I decided to look into this option. Now that my computer is safely fixed, I figured I could poke around without fear of retribution. So I called up the repair shop and spoke with a man named Ken Aldrich who described himself as a receptionist who also worked on computers from time to time.
It might be important to note here, at every point along my computer repair journey, I was met with courteous, helpful people. Not only did they successfully repair my computer, but they apologized for the delay.
Here's what I learned about the two queues at the repair shop: Normal service is billed at a rate of $36 an hour. It usually takes about 10 days to move through this line. However, at the beginning of the term there is often a large crunch; students and faculty returning from leave terms create a large demand for both upgrades and repairs. During such crunch times the waiting period for repair work can stretch to as long as a month.
Meanwhile there is the "Premium Service" queue. One enters this line by paying $63 an hour for the first hour of service and $36 for each additional hour. While some problems are automatically bumped to this queue, such as problems involving brand new computers, anyone can get in this line by agreeing to pay an extra $27.
Computers in this "fast lane" generally get repaired within two or three days. What happens during crunch times? Even then, the "Premium Service" queue rarely takes longer than three to four days. It all comes down to this: those of us who don't have money to throw around get screwed.
Isn't this in conflict with some principle of the College? Funny you should ask. Dartmouth "actively endorses" the following as listed in the Student Handbook under a section entitled "Computing Code."
"The primary goal and objective of this Computing Code is to assure that every user of Dartmouth College computing has two fundamental rights: privacy and a fair share of resources."
And yet, for $27 extra dollars, my wealthier fellow students are getting a "fairer" share of resources. Wow, I thought I was just getting screwed and it turns out that my fundamental rights are being violated. While the College has displayed a willingness in the past to completely ignore its own principles for the sake of financial expediency, I hope that this occasion will mark a victory for principle.
For if it does not, will we soon see the best Mass Row singles going to students who are willing to spend a few extra dollars? Will $5 or $10 grease the way into those tight, limited enrollment classes? Who knows, tomorrow you might hear someone order, "A Harold Burger, lettuce and tomato, and make that Premium Service."
