If being a senior has taught me anything, it's that graduation is like Fight Club. The first rule of graduation: Don't talk about graduation. Therefore it should come as no surprise that I currently exist in a more or less constant state of denial.
This week, our editors posed the question, "How does Dartmouth change you?" The answer occurred to me with such force and clarity that I can only liken the experience to that of Mormons who attest to receiving heavenly testimony from God.**## "Zoe," said a mystical voice.
I can sum up my attitude towards dating at Dartmouth in three words: Don't do it. I have exactly three friends (all squash players, weirdly enough) who have thus far managed to forge lasting, happy and essentially balanced relationships at this romantic wasteland we call home.
I am an English major. I am English major because I like to write (revelatory!) and because I don't particularly like to endure inhuman levels of academic agony.
I dedicate this article to my two roommates of years past, who have bought me Powerade and oyster crackers in times of dire need and have generally tolerated me during days when I have kept our one-room doubles completely dark until 6 p.m. I've had a lot of hangovers in my time. In high school, I was a cocky little shit who thought I was constitutionally immune from the alleged feeling of illness that follows a night of drinking.
We have too many forums at this school. Every time a big, sensitive or seemingly difficult-to-tackle problem arises, the preferred response, it would appear, is for Student Assembly (or maybe a random dean) to hold an open discussion in Collis Commonground to "start a campus dialogue" about the issue at hand.
Private school is a strange and esoteric world. Bizarre traditions abound. The terminology for the breakdown of grade levels is nonsensical (Intermediate School?
There are few words in the English language that elicit a more violent personal reaction from me than "networking." I find the word itself to be annoyingly cutesy one of those dumb corporate buzzwords like "synergize" or "matrix" which everyone loves to throw around but which ultimately lack real meaning and consider the process to be pointless, terrifying and depraved. Perhaps I'm biased by my deep fear of seeking out relative strangers for professional help.