Think Before You Drink: Tips for avoiding morning-after headaches
Probably.
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Probably.
After I was arrested and charged with burglary for semi-accidentally stealing wine and the Sunday Times from a convenience store, things calmed down.
One year after the University of North Dakota filed a lawsuit against the NCAA for banning the use of its mascot and nickname, the Fighting Sioux, the two parties have agreed to a settlement. Under the terms announced on Friday, UND will have three years to solicit the approval of the Spirit Lake and the Standing Rock Sioux Tribes to continue using the Fighting Sioux logo. If they fail to obtain permission from these tribes, they will have to officially retire their logo.
Victory is always sweeter when it's against a bitter, hated rival. The Red Sox have the Yankees, USC has UCLA, Wile E. Coyote has the Roadrunner. But who is Dartmouth's rival? There isn't really a natural choice for the Big Green. Within the Ivy League, Cornell lacks geographic proximity, and I don't think Dartmouth students really care about it either. Penn's too far as well, and Columbia is too apathetic and urban. We want a rival that feels like a more comfortable fit. I don't really have an opinion about Yale, and they seem to have their own faux-rivalry with Harvard anyway. Plus the Harvard-Yale "rivalry" seems to be more about academics except for the one time a year they pretend to care about football (note to both: we're on to your scam). I wish Boston College could be Dartmouth's rival (they don't seem to have one either, since BU isn't competitive with them in most sports), but they would pretty much destroy us in 80 percent of sports, if not more.
Circled by a self-flagellating cult of persistently counterclockwise freshman, the Goddess Bonfeu revels in the warm fetal glory of her worship. Ecce Homecoming.
Tuesday night's Student Assembly meeting focused on the passage of three funding proposals: the Thanksgiving and winter break New York City bus service, the laptop voucher program and the Pangea program.
Historically, Dartmouth College has been home to some of the loudest and most enthusiastic crowds in the Ivy League. Players, coaches and spectators all agree that an excited crowd makes attending and competing in Big Green athletic events more enjoyable for everyone. However, some people trying to achieve this objective have run into trouble with the authorities.
The start-of-term honeymoon is over, and campus is back to its usual bickering. Loving the Greek system, hating the Greek system, arguing about the college mascot. Alex Howe, wandering around outside Food Court, glancing maniacally in the direction of TDX and sharpening a mighty bundle of #2 pencils.
If last week 1-2 never felt so good, then 1-3 this week feels much worse. After beating Penn for the first time in 11 years a week ago, Dartmouth football was on the wrong end of a 50-10 thrashing that was broadcast all throughout New England. While the Big Green must be disappointed, losing to Yale is nothing to be ashamed of. Yale features a Walter Payton Award Finalist in Mike McLeod, the star senior running back who appears unstoppable this season, and Yale is nationally ranked in the Football Championship Subdivision (FCS), or as I like to call it, the Division formerly known as 1-AA. Make no mistake: This is a good Dartmouth football team, the best I have seen in my four years here, but they have yet to join the Ivy League elite. But they are well on their way.
Last winter's impeachment effort sparked the creation of the Governance Task Force, which was responsible for recommending how to revise the constitution. The new constitution changes the rules for impeachment, now requiring a petition signed by 500 members of the student body to depose the president. Impeachment will still also require a vote by three-quarters of the General Assembly and the presentation of articles for impeachment. This change, however, does not come into effect until next year.
As trippees trickled into Hanover and brought America to Dartmouth, Kapil Kale '07 and I roadtripped across the country and brought Dartmouth to America.
Members of the Class of 2007 enjoyed Dartmouth careers marked by a mix of highs and lows. During their time at the College, the graduating seniors witnessed dramatic changes in the faculty, participated in surprising Student Assembly presidential elections and mourned the death of a classmate.
Arriving back on campus for Fall term, students were greeted by a changed landscape, as the Tuck Mall and McLaughlin Residential Clusters and academic buildings Kemeny Hall and Haldeman Center opened in September.
For the final edition of WOE, I've enlisted the help of Dartmouth's finest minds: scholars like Kyle "Awareness" Owusu '07, Tanner "99th Percentile" Glass '07, Dr. Grant Lewis, Ph.D. '07, JT Wyman '08, Mike Devine '08 and Matt "Nonner" McKeon '08. I'm not really sure where this is going to go right now, but our meeting is based on airing out whatever grievances these six minds have come across in their Dartmouth experience. In keeping with the tenets of affirmative action, Kyle Owusu '07 gets to start things off:
I am running for Student Body Vice President in order to fix Student Assembly and to use it to improve the lives of the students it serves. From my experience as secretary of Student Assembly, I know exactly what the current problems are and how to fix them. As vice president, I will get away from the current trend of passing meaningless, self-serving bills and instead bring about real improvements by expanding student services and Student Assembly initiatives.
After exploring the many different facets of Dartmouth as a student and learning about our College's key strengths and weaknesses, I feel that I am in a unique position to offer solutions and a fresh perspective to Student Assembly as vice president. Especially after this year, I firmly believe that everyone on this campus wants to move in a direction that cements the changes we seek, pushes us to better opportunities in the future, and gives us the chance to flourish in our goals and ambitions. It is time that we squarely address the hindrances and frustrations we find in Student Assembly.
Ian and I want to empower students to accomplish their goals, and to make their life easier while doing it. We will immediately address Student Assembly's two primary flaws: its internal focus and the student body's lack of respect for it. Our Student Assembly will then build for the future. Please join us in our vision for Dartmouth.
I'm guessing many of you faithful WOE readers are probably sitting down with a fresh plate of eggs and toast dished out by my main man Lerrone of the Hop staff and have immediately turned The D to the back page for this very column. Well, take your time with your breakfast, sit back and relax because it's senior skip day. That's what Grant Lewis '07 told me anyway, and as questioning the knowledge of Grant "Too Good with Commas" Lewis is far beyond the fledging capabilities of this column, I leave it up to you to decide whether to participate in senior skip day. Personally, I'm all for it, mostly because skipping class is the only thing I can do to guarantee that I won't run into error-prone, mascot-obsessed sports writer Dave Glovsky '08.
I need to start this space with a correction of sorts: I mistakenly wrote last week that Rob Esposito selected Florida to beat UNC in his NCAA March Madness bracket. As it turns out, Espo in fact picked UNC over Florida, which meant I was giving him far too much credit. We will now return you to The Dartmouth's only back-page column actually devoted to Dartmouth sports.
People always complain about The Dartmouth (myself included, which might be a bit hypocritical since I wrote last summer, "Today marks the last day I will ever complain about The Dartmouth"). However, there are very few sections that are criticized as frequently as the opinion section. I cannot pass blame on my fellow columnists, nor our editors (that would be both easy and nonsensical). The problem lies not with the staff involved, but with the search process itself.