What Your Ice Cream Fore-U Order Says About You

By Annette Denekas and Caroline Berens | 7/18/16 9:40am

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Soft-Serve Vanilla with Rainbow Sprinkles:You are #basic. You really only order this particular type of ice cream so you can photograph it for your Instagram. At Starbucks, you’re probably a pumpkin spice latte kind of person, and you regularly order KAF salads for lunch. There’s nothing wrong with preferring to blend in with the crowd. We all do it sometimes, like when we pretend to be studying while eating lunch alone (rather than flaunting the fact that no one responded to our 15 “anyone for lunch @now??” GroupMe messages).

Dinosaur Crunch:You like to live on the edge. Some people might call you impulsive, foolish or downright reckless, but you like to think you’re just fun. You were the first to jump off the rope swing at Gilman Island despite rumors that it was dangerous. You streaked that Psych 1 final alone—without a mask—walking at a leisurely pace so that students and professors would remember your face. “To hell with the consequences,” you say!

Snickers: You’re witty and clever with an offbeat sense of humor. Everyone knows they can come to you when they’re having a bad day. And when finals come around, you’re the first streaker running through those massive lecture classes. You love to make people laugh, even if it’s at your own expense. Best of all, your hilarious Yik Yaks are always at the top of the “hot” list.

Moose Tracks:You’re what some might call “All-American.” You’re an upstanding citizen, respected leader and talented athlete. You strut through life with outward confidence in your abilities, but hide a secret desire to fit in with others. You walk a fine line between wanting to be original and bold, but also socially accepted; you want to stick out, but in a good way. Moose Tracks satisfies both these desires—it’s not the basic soft serve vanilla with rainbow sprinkles, but it’s not the rogue Dinosaur Crunch either.

Chocolate Lover’s Supreme: You like to indulge. You see no problem with skipping class and lounging in bed all day with nothing but Netflix and a large EBAs pizza to keep you company. You lay in the sun for hours at a time reading your books (for pleasure, not for class). For the life of you, you cannot understand why people go to the gym. Your professors, parents and dean seem a bit concerned, as does your doctor, but that’s okay. You’re perfectly content with your instant gratification lifestyle.

Rum Raisin: You’re in a dark place. Maybe you did something you regret. Maybe you drank a little too much and confessed your feelings to that cute soccer player in your math class, or maybe you saw your prof driving by as you stripped to do the Ledyard Challenge and screamed so loudly that Safety and Security had to be called. And now you’re punishing yourself by ordering the worst ice cream flavor in existence. Just don’t do it. Love yourself and order Chocolate Lover’s Supreme instead.

Oreo: You are responsible and reliable. The cautious and prepared one of the group, you carry around SPF 70 sunscreen and bring 10 extra outfits when you go on an overnight trip. You always play it safe—even when it comes to ice cream. The Moose Tracks ingredients are kind of ambiguous, and the idea of an ice cream called Dinosaur Crunch gives you anxiety. What if you pick a flavor and it tastes bad? What if you’re allergic to something in it? You know Oreos. You like Oreos. So you get the Oreo ice cream.

Strawberry Cheesecake: Much like this ice cream flavor, you are sweet and simple! You’re the person who’s always smiling and laughing, making other people’s day. But just like the cheesecake bites that lurk beneath the smooth strawberry ice cream exterior, you’re full of surprises. You aren’t afraid to discuss some juicy gossip, including that argument between so-and-so and her boyfriend that you overheard while sitting in a Collis study room.

Sugar-Free Butter Pecan: “Neurotic” is a good word to describe you. You’ve had perfect class attendance, you never go to sleep past midnight and you wake up at 8 a.m. every morning. You’re never late to a meeting (actually, you arrive five minutes before everyone else) and you stress over just about everything. There is an upside, though: you’ve always been your UGA’s favorite resident.

Coffee Cookie Dough: You are always up for a fun time. Sometimes you overwhelm yourself with the amount of activities you take on but you never want to miss out. Despite your four classes and two jobs, you signed up for three PE classes this summer and you’re determined to attend them all. You run from one obligation to the next all day long, downing a cup of DDS coffee every few hours. Hey, a busy schedule never hurt anyone, right?

Annette Denekas and Caroline Berens