If you are reading this page, go ahead and pat yourself on the back. Not because you're awesome for reading my column (which you are), but more because it signifies that you survived Green Key. To me, that deserves congratulations. When I woke up on Sunday morning, my mind was conflicted. Reflecting on the weekend brought a smile to my face, but I can't lie and tell you there was not some part of me that was relieved to finally cross the finish line of the marathon known as Green Key.
I heard the marathon metaphor a lot this past weekend, along with, "Man, this is a war of attrition." My favorite catchphrase I heard describing Green Key has to be the "Beer Olympics," because even though you may have had some batch, Boone's Farm or Twisted Tea over the weekend, Keystone was king.
This phrase really grabbed my attention. Everywhere I looked, I saw some different type of drinking game. Like Keystone, pong was obviously king. But with unique events happening throughout campus, it was evident that pong was not the only game in town. The variety of games combined with the summery weather reminded me that the London 2012 Olympics are right around the corner.
When you break it down, there are 36 different sports at the Olympics this summer. Since I won't be able to catch all of them, I want to touch on the three sports I'm most excited for. In honor of the Green Key spirit, I found a "Beer Olympics" comparison for each sport.
Basketball Beirut
Yes, the match is pretty elementary. Both games involve shooting a ball into a cup, and I bet you have told your friends while you're on fire, "I can't miss! I feel like Jordan!" Everyone has played it and knows the rules and certainly knows who stands a good chance of running the table. That is exactly how the rest of the world should be viewing the prospects of Team U.S.A. in basketball in London: the beirut team you do not want to draw at the other end of the table.
That said, there is reason for concern as both Derrick Rose and Dwight Howard have already been ruled out for the games. But have no fear NBA Sixth Man of the Year James Harden and former Kentucky Wildcat Anthony Davis have a chance to make the team. Imagine if both the "Beard" and the "Brow" are representing the U.S. in London. Harden is giving Kobe all he can handle in the Western Conference semis, and with Howard out, it would be a luxury to have a guy who can protect the rim like Davis. I hope Coach K gives them a shot if for no other reason than for the opportunity to dominate the international facial hair segment.
Track and Field Flip Cup
Like flip cup, the competition of track and field can be an individual event or a team effort. Both games involve speed and heart, and people usually stop caring after high school only the best continue to play.
The main event in London come July 27 may just be the men's 100-meter dash. By now I'm sure you are all familiar with the fastest man alive, Usain Bolt, but it's time to get very familiar with the name Yohan Blake. Blake, who is also from Jamaica, took advantage of a Bolt false start at the 2011 World Championships to win the gold. It will be interesting to see whether Americans Walter Dix, Justin Gatlin and Tyson Gay make any noise to contend with the dynamic duo of Bolt and Blake.
Rhythmic Gymnastics Funnel Race
Bear with me on this one. I know you're probably trying to figure out how in the world these two connect, but trust me, they do. Whenever I see someone doing a beer funnel, I immediately think of Will Ferrell and his performance as Frank the Tank in the movie "Old School" (2003).
U.S. rhythmic gymnast Julie Zetlin sure remembers Ferrell's gymnastic display in the movie. Zetlin's presence in London this summer will mark the first time the U.S. has sent a rhythmic gymnast to the Olympics since 2004. Whenever Zetlin is asked about Ferrell's act, she always says the same thing: "He was bad, very bad."
I hope you tune in to watch the events listed above, but make sure not to forget about some of my other favorites, which include team handball, tennis, beach volleyball, weightlifting and, of course, Michael Phelps. While you're at it, try some other all-time favorite summer games, like the power hour, snappa and quarters. Nothing says summer like the games both in London and in your parents' basement.
