Lets play two truths and a lie. (1) I never worry about class medians. (2) Nobody here cares about his/her future. (3) Bieber > Rebecca Black.
Okay, so they were all lies.
If there is anything I disapprove of more than jeggings, it is the subtle competitiveness that exists on this campus. I'm going to sound like a jerk, because I was once on Dimensions and told prospies that Dartmouth = Hogwarts + Disneyland. Since when has the grind of an Econ 20 problem set been equivalent to the adrenaline-induced giggles from nearly peeing yourself on Space Mountain?
Real talk: No matter how sweet we may seem on a Friday night, we are competitive at heart.
If you think this isn't true, look at yourself in the mirror (lol, The Mirror). I will. I'm going to call myself out #selfcallexistentialism.
I knew the medians of my pre-med classes like the back of my hand. I have secret DJ rivals who don't even know who I am (or that I'm a DJ). I'm hoping to shoot well above the average MCAT score. I eat three gummy vitamins a day (my body is a rock). I only listen to Soulja Boy. I have a summer internship (Baltimore, represent). I'm writing this Mirror article to suck up to my editors.
Why all this? My Dad didn't read me "Oh, the places you'll go!" for nothing. If he wanted me to bum around, he would have read me "Green Eggs and Ham." I'm competitive. Substitute a couple of words (switch pre-med to econ, swap Soulja Boy for Indie band XYZ) and so are you!
We want to be the best, do the best and achieve the most. From a purely demographic standpoint, take a look at the lucky '15s accepted this year. Thirty-two percent are valedictorians and 90 percent of accepted students are in the top 10 percent of their high school classes. We are a school of nerds. If we weren't competitive, we wouldn't have gotten in.
"Go big or go home," we challenge. Let's face it: None of us plan on going home. Home is getting Parkhursted or becoming a stripper.
I'm joking about the stripper. Sure, there's no kid setting fire to all the physics textbooks on reserve, but a passive competitiveness is ever-present. We secretly compare ourselves to everyone else but we keep it to ourselves. We guess how that guy did compared to the median, or how hard that girl really went out last week. Passive aggressiveness is the bane of our collective
