SAE Pledge: It's not a beer belly, it's a fuel tank for a sex machine.
Chi Gam Pledge [to AD pledges]: Do you guys sleep with your dogs?
AD Pledge: Uhh, I dunno.
Chi Gam Pledge: Well you should -- they're adorable.
Muslim 1: Where the heck are we gonna find a halal turkey?
Muslim 2: We can fashion a turkey out of halal chicken nuggets!
'10 Girl [passing Alpha Phi's bake sale]: Why aren't they selling pudding?
'11 Girl 1: How did TriKap formal go?
'11 Girl 2: Well I ended up at PhiDelt, so pretty well, I guess.
'12 Girl: I feel like every time after a Heorot dance party, I don't want to wash my clothes, I want to burn them!
Twin 1 [in Homeplate]: Tofu burritos?
Twin 2: That goes against the fundamental nature of burritos!
Twin 1: No Mexican eats tofu!
'11 Guy: I had one thing that was good and pure in my life, and that was the pumpkin cheesecake ice cream!
'12 Girl: Yeah, I haven't thrown up since I got here. I need to get on that.
Bitter '09 Girl: I hate Dartmouth.
Bitter '09 Guy: I've been disenchanted since freshman spring.
Second '09 Guy: I still like Dartmouth, but I have low expectations.
'11 [in the Psi U bathroom]: OMG. I LOVE kegstands.
Second '11: Really?
First '11: Yeah, like, I've always loved them. Since like, sophomore year.
'09 BG: "That's what she said" is not an overheard. It's just stupid. Who the f*ck edits this?
'09 BG: Me.
'12 Male: I can move my tongue really fast. It's my only skill.
'11 KDE: I thought she was dead, but then I saw her on Facebook Chat last night!
Wise Man [talking about drinking pastimes]: I like dice. It's more of like, a thinking game.
