We 03s know the story. Dartmouth College, back in the day, was Apple country. In 1999, incoming freshmen were advised, "more than 90 percent of students and faculty use Macintosh." In those sweet days of yore, the Macintosh was as much a Dartmouth fixture as Blitzmail, Food Court and muddy March quagmires. But no longer. I hereby proclaim that -- through much evildoing -- the peace-loving Mac has almost been stomped out of existence here in Hanover. I've called the EPA, and they're slapping an Endangered Species Act prohibition on any further Mac mistreatment. But it may be too late.
Oh, there are still the tired, beat-up iMac Blitz stations here and there, many of them inoperative. They ought to be put to pasture; after many years of fine service, those old machines choke with no RAM memory, mochaccino-flavored keyboards and key software continually on the fritz. All they do is give Macs a bad name. If you ask me, Dartmouth College needs a little bit of flag-waving by the last of the Mac faithful (the '03s!) in the hopes that some of you youngsters can enjoy the bright future without Microsoft-tinted sunglasses.
Last fall, a terse letter bolted down from Mt. Parkhurst to all administrative staff, ordering that everybody's Macs, no matter how new, shiny or beloved, be surrendered and replaced with Windows compatible machines "to improve efficiency" or something. Funny, that sounds just like what good ol' Computing Services said a few years before that: "Common use of Apple systems over the years has helped create robust, pervasive and easy-to-use computing services." Hmmmm. So Macs can't do the job anymore? Then why did the College have to resort to force, implicitly threatening peoples' jobs, to make the switch? To that I'd have to say (cough) Bull-she-hit.
Macs have had a long, illustrious history at Dartmouth. Beginning in 1983, before the official introduction of the Macintosh 128k, College officials sealed a deal with Apple to provide a total campus network, beating out rivals IBM and Digital Equipment. Over the next decade, Dartmouth grew to become one of the largest networks of Macs in the world, with over 10,000 machines. Even today, you can sign on to the Public server and peruse the antique Mac programs that used to make the campus tick -- Mac Draw II, WriteNow and more. It's like a trip down memory lane, cobwebbed and all too indicative of the College's utter neglect of today's new, revitalized Apple platform.
Yes, past glories aside, there are still plenty of good reasons why Macs are the right choice for Dartmouth in the here and now. First and foremost is the incredible new operating system, Mac OS X. This marvel of lush hedonistic bliss simply must be experienced by those who think computers have to suck. With Mac OS X, you get no crashes. No viruses. Lovely little icons and bubble-like buttons pulsate on the screen, as if alive. It's like being in the future, but you're still young and hip enough to dig it, baby.
But you won't see Mac OS X on the handful of new eMacs in Berry Library. Oh no -- although neighboring Dell machines run the latest Windows XP; the few Macs are all messed up, running Mac OS 9 -- basically from the time when Ren & Stimpy were making TV history. Why?
We've got to give Macs a fair shake, for the good of the innocent souls Bill Gates has not yet corrupted with his felonious "innovative methods." First, all the iMacs and eMacs in Berry are perfectly capable of running Mac OS X, which will extend their lives and stop their incessant crashing. Just think of all the student papers that will be saved! Second, Dartmouth employees should have the freedom to choose the computer that they are happiest working on, now and forever. Thirdly, I encourage the College to re-evaluate whether our new Microsoft Campus Agreement, a campus-wide annual license for Microsoft products, isn't the ugly piece of budgetary favoritism toward those monopolists that it appears to be.
I worry that the College has allowed wily Microsoft to derail its long-standing and beneficial relationship with Apple Computer. Indeed, since entering the Agreement, active support of new Macintosh equipment has come to a virtual standstill around here. BlitzMail for OS X is still buggy and lacks many features of Blitz for PC. The many programs on KeyServer for PC users and antique Mac enthusiasts alike are not offered for OS X, after two years of waiting. And GreenPrint, for me, is so green that it doesn't even print.
With most of the student body now running Windows machines, it's clear enough why Macs won't anymore be the toast of the town. But I hope Dartmouth will at least let them play as equal competitors. In the name of diversity!
