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(11/05/10 3:00am)
The other day, I ate a banana. I ate this banana on the way from my room to the library. Pretty simple act, right? Unpeel, eat, dispose. At least I thought it would be simple. What I found out about this seemingly normal action horrified me.
(10/22/10 2:00am)
I went to a prep school. Yeah, a prep school. As in living away from home, as in elitism, as in class on Saturdays. Prep schools are intense and unique experiences, and my time there has very much played a factor into how my college life has progressed. The effects of this run deeper than can be imagined.
(10/15/10 2:00am)
There are no plates in Homeplate. It no longer feels like home. Where does that leave the name? Imagine if they stopped serving food in Food Court. There would be an uproar! Where has the uproar been over the anachronistic name of Homeplate? We might as well start calling it ___________.
(10/08/10 2:00am)
Internships are the pledge terms of the real world. I can't stress the accuracy of this metaphor enough.
(10/06/10 2:00am)
I am a Dartmouth frat bro. I am not a rapist, nor do I work to create a "safe haven for sexual violence," as the recent column by Jordan Osserman '11 ("Dismissing Dissent," Oct. 5) would suggest. Quite the opposite, in fact. As a non-anonymous commentator, I just want to be very clear about who I am, and why the song "Out of Control" was truly offensive and counterproductive.
(10/01/10 2:00am)
Enough is enough. I've held it in for weeks now, but I just can't anymore. There is a certain type of person who needs to stop existing on the Dartmouth campus. You know who I'm talking about. The lanyard-wearers.
(09/24/10 2:00am)
"Remind me to do the Polar Bear Swim this winter. I'm gonna be so pissed at myself if I don't do the Polar Bear Swim before I graduate. I'm allergic to cold water, though. I bet it'll still be worth it."
(05/21/10 2:00am)
Formals are the dumbest and most unnecessary thing at Dartmouth College. Yeah, I said it. Literally the most unnecessary thing. More unnecessary than the FoCo flatscreens. More unnecessary than tattoos in the armpits of guys and the bra lines of girls. More unnecessary than any of the exhibits in the main hall of Baker Library. You can't top it.
(04/30/10 2:00am)
Etiquette is relative. That point can't be overstressed. At a dinner with somebody else's parents, you're supposed to chew with your mouth shut, ask polite questions and never laugh boisterously, no matter how funny it is to see your future in-law with a piece of cheese literally three feet long hanging from her chin. At Dartmouth etiquette is a bit subtler. If you knock over the other team's cups on a throw save, it is courteous to clean up the spilled beer. By sweeping it onto the floor.
(04/16/10 2:00am)
There's a commonly held consensus that there is a massive College taskforce that is charged with monitoring our blitzes. They never sleep, and they lie in waiting for one student to screw up and type "smoke" instead of "sm0ke." And then they pounce! They drag the student away in chains, Parkhurst them immediately and banish them to Siberia.
(02/01/10 4:00am)
J.D. Salinger died and what actually happened? He had drawn back from the public light so much that, at least to us, he was no longer a person, but simply a slim catalogue of amazing work and a Wikipedia page with a picture from 1950. There are only two possible ways that the death of J.D. Salinger could actually affect my life; both are very telling of the kind of life he led and what he meant to all of us.
(10/15/09 2:00am)
For those on campus who have been waiting with bated breath for an opportunity to talk anonymously about other students, wait no longer Bored at Baker is back. For all who don't know, Bored at Baker is a live gossip blog where all the posters are anonymous. Anybody can go on at any time and write anything he'd like, and his comment is immediately posted. This means that some pretty real tidbits get posted, as well as some egregiously false ones and everything in between. Basically, besides its humor value I'll admit that I've laughed at a couple of posts Bored at Baker is one of the worst things to happen to Dartmouth's social scene in recent memory, turning a normally warm environment into one where rumors are spread and feelings are hurt.
(10/06/09 2:00am)
Whenever I read a party blitz that has the word "kegs" in it, I am always less excited to go to that party than I was before. Or, when the Jack-O-Lantern blitzes out about how Keggy the Keg was stolen, I can't help but not care as much as I should. If somebody stole a Canny the Can mascot, though, then I might actually get angry. This is because, as current alcohol policy stands, kegs are so much of a pain to register and use that the Keystone can has become the symbol of alcohol on campus.
(09/23/09 2:00am)
William Shakespeare once wrote, "Friends, Greeks, freshmen, lend me your ears; I come to praise Orientation, not to bury it." Or at least he said something along those lines. And I have to say that I agree with him.
(08/18/09 2:00am)
In my mind, there are two types of Safety and Security officers. The first is the right type. These are the Safety and Security officers that acknowledge their role as protectors of students' safety and security, and act accordingly. These officers take sick students to Dick's House and makes sure that students are acting in a reasonably harmless way. The other type of Safety and Security officer is the one that bothers me. These are the officers that work as if they were cops.
(08/11/09 2:00am)
This coming weekend is the 40th anniversary of Woodstock, the famous festival that was a defining moment of the hippie movement. I'd like to say that I'll be doing something awesome and revolutionary to celebrate the occasion, but, sadly, the closest I'll come is watching footage of the concert. The closest Dartmouth came to celebrating Woodstock was the "big weekend" of Fieldstock. And this, my friends, is a travesty.
(07/31/09 2:00am)
Our parents have a unique perspective on our time at the College. They see our time here only in snapshots, whereas we live it continuously. Because of this, they can see how we've changed much more easily than we can. I decided to ask my mom what she noticed about the students she saw at the halfway point in their Dartmouth careers.
(07/14/09 2:00am)
We've all seen them around the girls who wear handbags in frat basements, the guys who try to set up games of Beirut. They come into our social world, drink our alcohol, never say "thanks" or "sorry," and are occasionally unruly. You know who I'm talking about the Tuck Bridge kids.
(07/01/09 2:00am)
The College will do well following the trajectory that President Wright set it on, at least for the foreseeable future, so you can keep his policies for now.
(05/14/09 3:53am)
In retrospect, it's easy to lump swine flu in with avian flu, SARS and every other health scare that never really materialized over the past few years. But we didn't always know this. The problem with our attitude towards swine flu was that we, as individuals, treated it as a joke epidemic even before it was revealed to be one. We read the warnings on the news and the precautions from Dick's House, and then, for the most part, went on with our unhealthy lifestyles thinking that no disease would actually affect us. Because of our position in society and our previous exposure to diseases like these, we, as young people, have acquired an undue sense of invulnerability.