By The Dartmouth Web Staff | 7/22/16 6:32am

’18: “Getting the money from suing someone would be nice, but there would just be too much paperwork for it to really be worth it.”

’18 overheard on FFB: “Hi, I’m [name], this is [name] and we have the lowest grades in the class. Nice to meet you.”

Overheard mother: “Your father is boring the people next to us. He’s an overwhelming well of unnecessary information.”

’18: “I like my men too weak to leave me, but not so weak that I have to make decisions.”

Overheard Dartmouth student: “I don’t understand it because I’m a fifteen-year-old child who’s failing high school.”

’16: “Dude, you’re hot! You’re twenty-one, you’re almost blonde…”

’18: “I was hooking up with a guy and he referred to his dick in the third person. At one point he looked down and said, ‘Wait, he hasn’t reached full power yet.’”

’18: “We got Professor Doug Irwin?! Oh my god, that’s so A-side.”

The Dartmouth Web Staff