Winterim Week By Week

By Tarika Narain | 1/8/16 8:07am

Some of us spent winterim hiking through the Amazon rainforest, while others traveled only as far as their fridge. Some of us learned the art of Tuscan cuisine, while others continued to burn toast in the safety of their homes. And while many of us set aside time for family and old friends, most of us spent six weeks burning through the list of Netflix originals.

For those of you who took the road most traveled (that’s to say, six week bed rest while hooked up to a Cheetos IV), here’s a week-by-week rundown of the thoughts you had this winterim:

Week One

I can’t wait to finally read all those books I couldn’t get to during fall term! Maybe I’ll even learn to knit. And I’ll paint my mom a portrait with the artistic skill I’ve been hiding all these years. She won’t even know what hit her! I have way too much to do, so I’ll have to unpack next week.

Week Two

Well, I just slept for an entire week straight! Let’s try this again. Oooooh, Thanksgiving leftovers! No, Mom, I told you I’d unpack next week.

Week Three

Netflix and chill is much more fun alone. There’s no one to stop me from watching six straight hours of Master of None. More like Master of Fun, am I right? Unpacking sounds like a next week sort of activity.

Week Four

I’ve tried logging into my old Neopets account three times this week. I’ve taken every BuzzFeed quiz there is, and it’s proven to be a profound journey of self-discovery. According to my pizza preferences, I’m a fun-loving optimist that everyone enjoys being around. But according to my favorite cat picture, I’m also going to be single for the rest of the year. Maybe I should try going to the gym. Nah, then I won’t have anything to make my New Year’s resolution. Do less, Tarika. Like less unpacking.

Week Five

All my friends are back from other colleges! I should see them. Let me text...what’s her face…the blonde one…um…who were my friends in high school again? I should figure this out before I unpack.

Week Six

I’ve successfully turned procrastination into a career. Getting ready for back-to-school is so simple since 1) I never unpacked, and 2) I’ve been living in the same pair of pajamas for six weeks. There’s that Ivy League genius I always knew I had!

Tarika Narain