8 People Who Deserve Honorary Degrees at Dartmouth

By Fiona Ewing, The Dartmouth Staff | 11/9/15 6:53am

Dartmouth’s Council on Honorary Degrees recently began compiling nominations for potential recipients. Honorary degrees will be awarded at Commencement in the spring, but faculty and members of the graduating class have been requested to offer names of individuals to be considered for the honorary degrees. While we’re sure there are some great ideas, we wanted to be sure to put these names on the table.
Souleymane:Likely the happiest, most iconic and beloved member of the Dartmouth family, it’s time for us to show Souleymane how much we truly appreciate him and offer him an honorary degree. Seeing him at the Hop can brighten anyone’s day, and if there’s anyone deserving of being on this list, it’s him.

Novak Djokovic:Completely dominating the tennis world in recent years, Novak Djokovic could teach us a thing or two about staying up there in the rankings. He’s from Serbia so he definitely knows how to bear the cold, and above all, just imagine how good he’d be at pong! Also because of this moment.

Malia Obama: Now a senior in high school, Malia Obama made headlines after pictures surfaced of her at a dorm party during her recent visit to Brown. Sadly, Malia has toured every Ivy except Dartmouth and Cornell. But maybe receiving an honorary degree would help her see that if she wants to get away from it all, there may be no better place than Hanover.

Stephen Colbert:His persona graduated from Dartmouth, and it’s just about time that we gave Colbert his own honorary degree. Plus, how could we not recognize someone for tackling one of Dartmouth’s Robotic MVPs (Mobile Virtual Players) on his show after calling it “huggably plush”?

Waldo from Where’s Waldo?:Because no one knows where Dartmouth is. Plus, it’s about time we acknowledge that there are children’s books out there that haven’t been written by Dr. Seuss.

Collis Steve:Darbeat’s love affair with Collis Steve continues as we proclaim this man worthy of a Dartmouth degree.

Donald Trump:Because he could be the one to “Make Dartmouth Great Again!” Maybe? To be fair, he did just give SNL its best ratings in years. Maybe he could offer some advice on how to make it big, go bankrupt and make it big again to some of our econ majors.

The Incredible Hulk:Because he’s the original Big Green (Ha.) and awarding him an honorary degree, we might finally be able to justify last year’s Superheroes v. Villains ­­­­Winter Carnival theme.

Fiona Ewing, The Dartmouth Staff