Fact or Fiction: The Most Iconic (Fictional) Dartmouth Alumni

By Julia Vallone | 11/3/15 7:17am

From Doctor Seuss to Shonda Rhimes, Dartmouth has produced a variety of extremely successful individuals in various fields. While these individuals enjoy campus-wide notoriety — and often have their last names plastered across buildings — we as a student body often forget about our most important alumni: the fictional men and women who spread the Dartmouth name throughout the world of literature and cinema. Today we honor these very important people with a ranking of the nine most iconic fictional Dartmouth alumni.
9. Bella and Edward (The Twilight Saga)

At #9 we have every pre-teen’s favorite couple, the immortal lovers Edward and Bella Cullen. These dysfunctional vampires venture to Dartmouth after four novels packed full of angst, animal blood and terribly awkward social interactions. Is this a stain on our reputation? Perhaps. Was I embarrassed searching for photos of this dynamic duo with an unguarded laptop screen in Starbucks? 1,000% yes. Do we regret the publicity? Absolutely not.

8. Evan and Fogell (Superbad)

These two adorable troublemaking teens come in at #8, because I know that there is a little McLovin inside of each and every one of us.

7. Natty Bumppo (Leatherstocking Tales)

Coming in at #7 is Natty Bumppo, famed protagonist of James Fenimore Cooper’s Leatherstocking Tales. Estimated to have been one of Eleazar Wheelock’s first pupils, Bumppo receives recognition in this list for his skill with the long rifle… and the fact that he was once portrayed by Daniel Day-Lewis. #look@thatflow #unf

6. Lawrence Kutner M.D. (House)

Our favorite member of House’s esteemed diagnostic team clocks in at #6. Dr. Lawrence Kutner holds a special place in our hearts for a variety of reasons… mainly:
1. He holds the Guinness World Record for longest distance crawled (21 miles)
2. He lit a patient on fire while mid-resuscitation (via defibrillator)
3. He streaked at the Dartmouth-Penn football game (#GoBigGreen)

5. Pete Campbell (Mad Men)

Yes, Pete Campbell may be a selfish, pretentious you-know-what, but as part of the the iconic Mad Men cast he rings in at #5 on our list.

4. Dr. Stephen T. Colbert (The Colbert Report)

As Stephen Colbert’s self-important-right-wing alter ego, Dr. Stephen T. Colbert was the main character of The Colbert Report — known for satirizing the life and work of cable news stars. Drawing inspiration from Bill O’Reilly and Rush Limbaugh, Dr. Stephen T. Colbert uses his fictional Dartmouth education to host hilarious interviews and speak on various subjects.

3. Michael Corleone (Godfather Film Trilogy)

Dubbed the 11th most iconic villain in film history by the American Film Institute, Michael Corleone ranks #3 on our list of iconic Dartmouth graduates. Corleone attends Dartmouth College in hopes of receiving the typical American experience before he is pulled into the “family business.” Do the films feature copious amounts of violence and explosives? Absolutely. But at the same time Michael Corleone marries (and has children with) his college sweetheart Kay Adams, so really you could classify the entirety of The Godfather Trilogy as a twisted Dartmouth love story.

2. Mike Wazowski and James P Sullivan (Monster’s Inc. & Monster’s University)

Did Mike Wazowski and James P Sullivan technically attend Dartmouth College? No. However, they did attend its doppelgänger Monster’s University and they are incredibly adorable, which I think warrants a #2 ranking.

1. Meredith Grey (Grey’s Anatomy)

Finally, at #1, we have the legendary Meredith Grey, known for her emotional instability and sometimes-prickly (but altogether loveable) personality. As the protagonist of Grey’s Anatomy since its debut in 2005, we have followed Meredith Grey through all of her ups and downs. And by ups and downs I mean we have followed her through all of her downs, because obviously Shonda Rhimes does not believe in happiness — or understand the importance of a weekly dose of McDreamy. Regardless, Meredith never hesitates to rep her slouchy Dartmouth T-shirts and for this reason (among many others) we could not love her more.

Julia Vallone