Which Winter Carnival Events Would “Game of Thrones” Characters Attend?

By Katie McConnell | 2/5/14 5:00am

99 Cent Ski Day: Joffrey Baratheon

Joffrey named his sword, so he’d probably also name his newly sharpened skis. Look out for him on the slopes – he always feels like he has something to prove and ski racing is no exception. Though he might sit on the Iron Throne, Joffrey is painfully aware that he’s not yet King of the Skiway.

Ice Sculpture Carving Competition: Arya Stark

Solid ice would be no match for Arya’s impressive sword skills – she would let out all of her angst and aggression by chipping away at the ice with The Needle. Her sculpture would probably be something suitably violent, or perhaps surprisingly touching, like a tribute to some of her late family members.

Polar Bear Plunge: Theon Greyjoy

Theon is from the Iron Islands, so he’s used to being cold and damp, and he’s been in some pretty painful situations lately, so this probably wouldn’t seem that bad or hypothermia-inducing for him. He also seems to think that he’s already dead, so a little cold water isn’t going to kill him. Maybe taking the plunge will finally make his father respect him?

Carni Classic: White Walkers

This event has been revamped as a snowshoe race on Gold Coast lawn. But the White Walkers wouldn’t need to have snowshoes flapping behind them, since flying over frozen tundra is basically what they do all the time. These supernatural beings would totally dominate this event and probably wreak some havoc, so I would suggest running in the other direction if you see them coming.

Cu++er: Tyrion Lannister

You just know that he would wear a ridiculous uni costume and make his dwarf height work for him. Tyrion, with his propensity for drunken revelry, would be the life of the party. Since he’s already the outcast of his family, he would be down for some absurdity, despite his actual cleverness.

Champagne: Cersei Lannister

This girl can drink, but she prefers wine, and I’m sure she’d love champagne if that existed in Westeros. She’s learned how to effortlessly schmooze and socialize from her queenly appearances at social events, so she would jump at the chance to look classy and show off her new bosom-revealing dress and elaborate braided hairstyle.

American Authors Concert: Jon Snow

With his long locks and perpetually pouty demeanor, Jon is totally a brooding hipster. American Authors would be suitably indie for him, even if one of their songs is starting to get pretty mainstream. Regardless, being at the concert would suit his artistic sensibilities and allow him to bob his head along to the beat and avoid interacting with others.

Beach Party: Daenerys Targaryen

Khaleesi has been known to enjoy a good crowdsurf and she would rule the dance floor, especially if she had her dragons in tow. Their fiery breath would help keep the beachy temperatures scorching. Besides, Daenerys is used to the heat from her time in the desert and she’d love the chance to sport one of her skimpy outfits.

Occom Pond Party: Sansa Stark

Sansa would definitely want to be a graceful figure skater – she would love slowly twirling around in extravagant outfits and hairstyles. Though Sansa would assume that Joffrey would never make an appearance at something so tame, he would still show up and tauntingly circle around her in his hockey states, challenging her to compete against him.

Human Dog Sled Race: Bran and Direwolves

Bran might not be able to walk anymore, but he could hold on tight to a colorful plastic sled while his loyal direwolves happily pulled him along through the fluffy snow. While they aren’t technically humans, they’re not really dogs either, and even if they got disqualified, they would still win the cuteness category. If all else fails, Hodor could always step in and pull everyone with ease.

Chili Cook-off: Samwell Tarly

Sam is definitely a fan of good food, though he hasn’t been getting much of it since he joined the Night’s Watch. I bet he would be a decent cook, too, and could definitely rock an apron. He might even enter his own submission. Sam might never taste fish pie, but I bet he would like chili better anyway and it would warm him right up before he returned to The Wall.


Katie McConnell