While most Dartmouth students fill their time with involvement in campus organizations, sports, social events and the occasional trip to the library, a few undergraduates also engage in a different kind of activity: planning for married life.
Eliana Ramage '13, an English major and a Native American studies minor, married 2009 New York University graduate Steven Aiello on March 18 at her home in Tennessee.
The wedding was attended by 150 of their closest friends and family members, according to Ramage, who said she decided to get married at this stage in her life because many of her relatives are "serious about committing to people."
"We had talked about marriage earlier on, but I felt that by junior year, a person is more set," Ramage said. "I'm not saying we won't go through changes. We will still change, but at this point I feel more sure of the basics."
Ramage said that her family and friends were all very supportive of her decision and recognized early in their relationship that marriage would be a possibility.
"My friends were very sweet when I told them I was engaged and planned to get married," she said. "A lot of people at Dartmouth originally thought it was nuts nuts in a good way."
The couple met and began dating in August 2009 a month before Ramage matriculated at the College while she was participating in an intensive Arabic language program in Israel. While Ramage moved to Hanover to begin her undergraduate career, Aiello began law school in Israel, where he is a citizen.
The relationship was sustained via Skype and email, but Ramage said that the couple remained together with help of the flexibility of the Dartmouth Plan and Dartmouth's foreign study programs, which allowed her to travel more easily through Europe and the Middle East.
"When we saw each other for the first time in five months, he gave me a three-month-late birthday card with a word-search in it," Ramage said. "I crossed out all the words of things we had done together, and what was left of the scrambled words was, Eliana, will you marry me?'"
Ramage plans to graduate at the end of Fall term 2012 in order to move to Israel with her husband. In anticipation of her early graduation, she has taken four classes every term since her freshman fall.
Ramage said that Dartmouth's lack of married student housing and her ultimate ambition to become financially independent after her wedding compelled her to work five jobs last term to help pay for the couple's current home in Enfield, N.H.
She has taught Hebrew, tutored Bar Mitzvah students, delivered newspapers for The Dartmouth, worked for Green Corps and was involved in the College's reader-to-reader program, she said.
Once she and her husband have established themselves in Tel-Kabir, Tel-Aviv, Ramage who is fluent in Hebrew and is studying Moroccan Arabic plans to become a writer, she said.
Rebekah Riley '13, a studio art major and education minor, became engaged last term to Andrew Lopata, an undergraduate at Gannon University in Erie, Penn.
Riley and Lopata met at the age of six, having grown up together in Hamilton, N.Y., Riley said. They two dated for a year prior to their engagement and plan to marry after they have both solidified their careers, she said.
Riley plans to work for Teach for America or teach in a city school in Pennsylvania while Lopata attends medical school, she said.
"We are both focused on our careers and very realistic, but it seemed inevitable that we would get engaged," Riley said. "It seemed like a good step in our relationship, something that would definitely happen, and so we might as well get it started."
Although she and Lopata attend different colleges, Riley said she has managed to sustain her relationship through frequent visits.
"It has been difficult, and it wouldn't have worked if we had just met," she said. "In my opinion, if two Dartmouth students were engaged at this stage, it would be viewed as less normal."
Lopata initially attempted to propose over Skype but ended up proposing in a playground the two used to visit when they were children, Riley said.
"It was really cute, very classic, and he got down on one knee," she said. "We were both very clear that marriage was something for the future rather than something that should happen soon."
Although some people responded with shock to her engagement, most of Riley's friends were excited, she said. The relationship has made her more responsible and mindful in social situations, she said.
Government major Jessica Merry '12 plans to be married in Richmond, Va., on June 30. She and Joey Samuels, an undergraduate at Williams College, have been dating since she was in 10th grade.
Merry said that the couple decided to get married this coming summer because their plans to attend graduate school might interfere with marriage plans in the future.
"I'm going to Yale Law School [in the fall], and he also plans to attend law school, and so, although it's early and we would have preferred a longer engagement, we figured we would take the punch," she said.
Samuels proposed to Merry while they were touring the U.S. Capitol building during winter interim, Merry said.
"I thought the tour was for our anniversary, and then he pulled the ring out of his pocket," she said.
Merry and Samuels maintained their relationship via visits throughout the term and regular Skype sessions.
"We always took the long-distance thing one step at a time, but I'm glad we're on the home stretch," she said.
Merry said that her relationship has had an overall positive impact on her life at Dartmouth. She has had few experiences attending fraternity formals or other social events, and she has not been exposed to the hook-up culture on campus that often involves "pong as foreplay," she said.
"The relationship has allowed me to develop really good guy friends, and it has created a really nice social situation because I am part of an extra community among his friends at Williams," she said. "People I don't know are often surprised at my decision to get married, but my close friends were surprised it took this long."
