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The Dartmouth
May 5, 2024 | Latest Issue
The Dartmouth

How to Talk to a Blacked-Out Person

1) Make no sudden movements.

2) Say things that make no sense. Claim it was a pun. Laugh loudly for 30 seconds.

3) Every few minutes, ask, "Remember when Michael Jackson died?"

4) If they start to cry, RUN. There's no consoling them.

5) Don't dare them to flip a table.