Every time one of these big Dartmouth weekends comes, I begin to feel a bit afraid. In my three years at Dartmouth I have gotten used to the patterns and stories -- the half-forgotten nights, near-death cases of alcohol poisoning, the cases of sexual assault and the trickle of students heading into Dick's House to deal with mistakes committed and violations experienced that weekend. Every one of the problems resulting from these weekends and many weekends at Dartmouth has a common cause -- alcohol, a substance I will never be able to view the same way again.
Nearly every case of sexual assault on this campus involves alcohol, a man trying to prove that his drunkenness makes him devoid of blame for his irresponsible behavior and a further decimation of the hope that the world is a safe and inherently good place. We cannot pretend that this liquid is merely some innocent social lubricant.
This chain of thought was triggered a couple of weeks ago when I received a newspaper clipping from the Chicago Sun-Times that my parents had sent me. A few blocks away from where I grew up, outside of Chicago, a 16-year-old girl had been raped. At a party near my home, the girl drank so much alcohol that she passed out. Three of the boys at the party took turns raping her limp, vulnerable body. A fourth boy found a video camera with which to record the events, cheering his buddies on as they -- I don't know what terms are strong enough to express what they did or the degree of pure hate which I feel for them.
When finished, two other boys who had been in a different room -- though aware of what had transpired -- picked up some markers and proceeded to scribble obscenities across her body. They wrote on the body of a girl raped three times and laughed into the video camera.
The girl didn't wake up until the next afternoon. Her naked, raped body lay there in the bedroom as the 17- and 18-year-old boys finished with the party and went to bed.
The police now have that video and all six boys involved have been arrested. Out on $100,000 bail, some of the boys have returned to my high school and walk around free. I can't help but imagine the sympathetic comments they receive as they complain about how unfairly they are being treated -- the same type of comments Dartmouth males make as they return to their classes, houses, dorms and frats after being charged with sexual assault.
What is wrong with so many men? It's men who commit at least 97 percent of reported rapes in the United States. I have spent a lot of time trying to get people to sympathize with men and to notice the high rates of suicide and depression and alcoholism that befall them. I cannot say, though, that I do so without understanding those who believe men do not deserve sympathy.
While men deserve attention and care for the social ills that befall us, maybe it is time that we prove as an entire sex that we deserve care and attention -- that we will not use it to cure ourselves of our suffering while continuing to inflict pain on women. It is time that men stand up and not only sign a pledge that they will not sexually assault other people, but also live by that pledge and enforce it on others.
Men must become responsible not only for their own actions but for those of the men around them as well. Men must learn to step in when they see a friend or brother denigrating, belittling or attempting to take advantage of another human being.
I began this column intending to write simply about being more careful with alcohol, and here is where my angry fingers took me. I'm tired, and I'm afraid. I'm tired of the violence and the rape, and I'm afraid that you men out there will finish reading my words only to say, "I'm doing all I can." When rape and sexual assault are no more on this campus, then I will believe that every man on this campus has the right to say that sentence. Until then, I remain afraid, yet hopeful that if we all in a single consciousness decide to stop the violence, that we can.
