Well, freshmen, just a few more months and the College would like to know what our D-Plans are going to be. I trust you are all burning the midnight oil with your ORC figuring out when you need classes, when you want to take leave terms and so forth. Yeah right.
I myself read the ORC a bit over Christmas (kind of like saying "I read War and Peace a bit over Christmas"), and it is certainly one of the more intimidating books known to humankind. After college I want to attend medical school, so I need all of the pre-med courses, and I think I also want to double-major (yes, I do like pain, thank you for asking!), so I was trying to figure out if I will finish in four years. The answer is it's going to be close.
Actually, I am not sure if I will keep both majors, since I would like to free up some classes for some of the cool stuff out there. There are some really good classes at Dartmouth if you peruse the ORC carefully enough.
On my recommended list:
"College Course 22.586: Techniques for World Domination. 98S: 10A. This class takes an interdisciplinary approach to the task of assuming and maintaining political, economic, social and emotional control over the people of the world. Drawing on the resources of the physics department, students will design and construct their own thermonuclear warheads. From the psychology department, they will acquire the skills necessary to convert their newfound military power into totalitarian control of all other human beings. Students are encouraged to kill one another in order to facilitate individual gains in power. Required class materials: students must obtain approximately 50 pounds of weapons-grade plutonium (available at local military bases to those who can run quickly). Dist: I."
"Math 1/8: An Introduction to Numbers. 98X: 12. This course is intended to make math accessible to those majoring in the humanities. We begin by introducing some of the basic numbers, such as 1, 2, 5 and 7. We will then examine some of the practical applications of these numbers, such as addition and keeping track of how many fingers we possess. In a final paper, students will explore the history, numerology and modern role of one of the numbers introduced in class, and they will consider how that number can be written next to "1" to form a whole new number known as a 'teen.' Dist: QDS."
"English 22 1/6: I Like to Read! Not offered in the period from 83S until 2437W. Intended for math and science majors, this is the course that makes reading fun. First we will learn several words that do not correspond to buttons on a TI-85. Then we will combine these words into 'sentences,' utilizing our new vocabulary in a context that will be familiar to the class: 'What is [A]-1 arccos(ANS*e2i) / (nderiv Y1, X, 3)?' Later in the term, we will introduce the class to 'books,' touching on such topics as which way they open, why there are not any pictures or diagrams and how to follow the words along with our fingers so that we can read them. Dist: LIT."
"Drama 107 W:pass: I Wish I Were an Oscar Mayer Wiener: Turning a Dream into Reality. 98S. In this class, inspired by the famous commercials, students will gain invaluable immersion into acting. In addition to writing two papers, students will be required to wear a giant hot dog suit at all times. Students will be outwardly happy and jovial for the entire term, even when they are beaten, ridiculed, kidnapped as part of rush and chased across the green by hungry frat dogs. Dist: ART."
With all of these options out there, I am not sure I want to tie up all of my classes in a double major. This is sort of complicating my D-Plan. I mean, I can understand that the college needs to know when people won't be here for housing reasons (Read: "Tell us when we can plan on sticking some horrendously foul person in your room."). It's just that I am not sure exactly what I want to do yet. If you run into me next term, when the D-Plans are due, ask me if I got it all figured out. I'll be the one wearing the giant hot dog.
