There has been much discussion in recent weeks about what to call the class of 2000. Well, in case anyone hasn't heard -- they are zeroes. Despite the fact that this decision was not made by committee, or announced in The D, it is pretty much official. I have yet to hear them called anything else.
And to be honest, thus far they seem to have earned the title. Their performance at the football games has been, in a word, pathetic.
I'm not talking about rushing the field (yet), I'm simply talking about attendance. Having attended every home game since my freshman year, I've been especially disappointed at the lousy turnout by the '00s. I congratulate the ten or 12 of you who attend every week. I applaud the guy who heckled the officials all through the second half of the Holy Cross game. I'm not quite sure what to say to the rest of the class.
On the off chance that none of you freshmen know how this works, let me explain it to you.
Rule One: YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO ATTEND THE GAMES. All of you. It's part of the unwritten rules of Dartmouth conduct. I would love it if you attended all Dartmouth sporting events, but I will settle for seeing more 'shmen at Football games.
Rule Two: You must all sit together on the far north side of the home stands. Don't sit with the upperclassman. Don't sit with the fraternities. Don't sit down in front with the players' girlfriends. Sit with the other 'shmen.
Rule Three: Wear your '00 jersies. If you don't have one, then buy one.
Rule Four: Stand up. Don't just stand up for touchdowns, or to wave at your friends when they come in late (which you also shouldn't be doing). Stand for the entire game. Have some respect for the players, the upperclassman, and the alumni, and stand up.
Rule Five: Learn the fight song and the alma mater, and sing them. As I recall, the leaders of my freshman trip taught me both. I am not sure what they're teaching on the Dartmouth Outing Club trips these days, but given the deadening silence from the freshman section, it's obviously not the alma mater.
Now, unwritten rule number six is a little bit controversial. It involves the lost freshmen art of rushing the field. I must admit that I myself failed to do this my freshman year. I wanted to, I really did. When Homecoming rolled around, however, I was too intoxicated to see the field, much less race the Hanover Po' across it. I consider mine to be the only valid excuse for not rushing.
I'm not suggesting that the freshman start a riot. The Class of 1997 tried that during the Freshman Sweep in the Fall of 1993. What I am saying is that the freshman need to take control of their destiny. Don't let the Administration tell you what kind of class to be. It would be great if you could form zeroes on the field to represent your class as was done it the past, but then you might get caught. Hanover Po' is slow, but not that slow. So run like mad, and try and avoid old ladies in wheelchairs.
Dartmouth is your campus now. It may not seem that way this weekend when the alumni descends from all corners of the globe and you spend your evenings standing in the cold outside Alpha Delta fraternity's door, but it is true. Show the alumni that the Dartmouth spirit lives on in you. Prove to the upperclassmen that you aren't zeroes. Rush the field!
