At a highly charged discussion Wednesday night about "social rules" at the College, members of the Dartmouth community stressed the need to have more respect for each other, themselves and the community.
Close to 200 people, almost entirely students, packed into a standing-room-only Collis Common Ground to take part in the open forum, titled "Social Rules at Dartmouth: Where do we draw the line?"
Director of Health Resources Gabrielle Lucke moderated the discussion, which touched on such varying issues as alcohol, sex, communication between the sexes and the role of the Greek system in the campus social life.
Lucke started the program by reminding the audience, the majority of which were '98s, that despite its differing perspectives on many issues, it still is a close "community of people."
"You have had experiences good and bad together; you have a history together," Lucke said. "You can be the change agents -- the first step is to remember your connectedness."
The most talked-about topic during the open forum, which lasted about 90 minutes, was the Greek system, and whether or not is is unfairly blamed for problems that occur on campus.
A male member of the audience said the Greek system is often the target of unfair criticism because "people like having scapegoats."
"If someone has a bad night and finds themself in a bad position, it's easy to blame it on someone else -- that's human inclination," he said.
Robyn Brown '98 said there is a "lack of people taking responsibility for their own actions."
Abbie Roberts '98 said sometimes it appears Greek houses are not taking responsibility for their actions, but in reality, they are maintaining solidarity.
"Houses have to project themselves as not divided," Roberts said. She said when a house is faced with the decision of whether or not to separate itself from an individual wrongdoer, the entire house "is more likely to turn inward and say 'we don't have problems' in order to look good for the campus."
Alcohol was mentioned by many as the cause of problems on campus, and several said they felt the Greek system is inevitably going to be blamed because it is the most prolific supplier of alcohol to students on campus.
The Greek system is "the most obvious place where you can get alcohol," according to Dave Belden '97.
A male member of the audience said "when you get 400 college-aged people in one setting with drinking, dancing, alcohol -- things are going to happen. It's just a fact."
P.J. Halas '98 called alcohol use "a personal choice," which, if exercised, necessitates people taking responsibility for their actions.
"I'm a member of a fraternity, and I go out and have a good time, without drinking," Halas said. "It's all about being responsible -- you have to look youself in the mirror and make that choice for yourself."
Lucke echoed Halas's sentiments, urging people to ask themselves, "When I make the choice to use alcohol, am I prepared to deal with the consequences of my alcohol use?"
Audience members also discussed male-female communication, and Lucke urged each side to try to better understand where the other side is coming from.
"Women need to think about certain things in a different way than men do," Lucke said.
"What may not be a big deal for men may be very serious for women," she said.
One female audience member offered some advice to the women in the crowd: "If you feel you're going to get attacked at a fraternity, don't go there and don't drink. It's ridiculous to go to someone's house, act irresponsibly, then resist when they ask you to leave."
Kirby Cook '98 called on the women in the audience to "unite and take care of each other."
And to the men in the audience, she said, "We are sisters, mothers and daughters. We are the women in your lives -- take care of us."
