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July 11, 2025 | Latest Issue

Top 5 Facebook Statuses to Announce the Apocalypse

Everyone is making apocalypse jokes like there's no tomorrow.
So far this apocalypse is off to a slow start. I cannot believe i shaved for this.
I never liked you guys anyway.
I hope the end of the world is just like the movies. me and jake gyllenhaal burning books in a library. with wolves.
Woah, guys, was that a tremor? did i just feel a tremor? i'm in the stacks so i'm not sure but I'm pretty sure that was a tremor. did you feel it? is this it? did we both feel it? i felt a tremor!