In purely quantitative terms, cable programming dominates broadcast TV. The amount of airtime occupied by cable-exclusive shows towers over primary network programming from CBS, NBC, ABC, FOX and PBS and overshadows their combined production almost 100-fold. Despite the substantial viewership of cable series, the fact still remains most cable shows are unadulterated crap. Cable networks are unrivaled at pumping out hour after hour of garbage, entirely devoid of a single redeeming second and unworthy of even a moment's attention. A prime example of this trend can be found in the History Channel's reality series "Pawn Stars," the most-watched show on cable.
The basis of "Pawn Stars" is quite simple. The show features a family-owned pawnshop in Las Vegas that negotiates with patrons as they try to pawn some slightly valuable antiquities. Sure, on paper this premise sounds mildly appealing, and even tangentially relatable to educating viewers about history. But despite the show's unexpected locale and somewhat innovative premise, its positive qualities are minimal. Put simply, "Pawn Stars" is abysmal television.
The pawnshop seems to only do business with unlikable morons most of the customers have an aura of douchebaggery that simply cannot be overlooked. The most affable of the pawn stars themselves is a cantankerous old man whose solitary role on the program is as a source of ridicule. A cast compiled of three idiotic tools and a grumpy old dude does not exactly scream enjoyable television.
Each episode is composed of patrons entering the shop and attempting to hock a series of potentially valuable items. Herein lies the "educational" merit which the station touts so highly, but it is simply a footnote to stupid humor and terrible production value. An "expert" comes in to appraise each item, but those experts are quite often just casual friends of the store owners and rarely offer any historical insights beyond the level of fifth grade social studies. These sequences are also the epicenter of yet another glaring flaw in the show's framework: unbelievably terrible writing.
Of course, "Pawn Stars" is a reality show starring real life pawners, but series of this pseudo-educational genre are always scripted just as much as any other show on television. The real issue is that allegedly real life pawners are not good actors. The dialogue on "Pawn Stars" is forced, unnatural and grating. It sounds as though each line is poorly read off a trembling cue card, and the cast struggles to enunciate even the simplest of phrases.
I am amazed such a dreadful program could have remained on the air for four seasons. I'm even more amazed that this past week "Pawn Stars" was the most watched show on cable television. The show aired on Monday at 10 p.m. and 10:30 p.m. Both episodes garnered over six million viewers, taking the titles as both the number one and two most-viewed episodes. Are you serious, America? Out of the countless alternatives to watch on a Monday night, you chose "Pawn Stars"? Even turning off your television and staring at a blank screen would have been a more beneficial use of time.
"Pawn Stars" represents only one of the many increasingly lowbrow programs that are dominating cable viewers. Almost as notable is the phenomenon of "Spongebob Squarepants" taking the eight, 10, 11 and 14 slots in the most-watched cable category last week. Seriously, cable audiences, watch something like "The Daily Show" or "Ace of Cakes." There are good shows on cable, I promise.
