Today's column marks the end of our "Toe to Toe" tenure. I am a bit too lazy to count how many rounds my colleague and I have had in the ring during our year-long term, but one number I am quite certain I am in the ballpark of figuring out is the figure I like to call "less than or equal to five," which represents the number of wins Hodes collected since we started last Spring term. In the spirit of our departure, we decided on a "final battle" recounting the best of our 30,000 or so (each) "toe to toe" words.
I suppose the most appropriate place to start is our 2007 NFL draft column, in which we gave our opinions on a few standard post-draft related topics. I have to toot my own horn a bit and say that my correct prediction of both the offensive and defensive rookies of the year is at least fairly impressive. Granted, I did think my choices were painfully obvious, seeing as the best running back prospect of the new millennium would be running behind a strong Vikings offensive line and the best sideline to sideline linebacker prospect in the same time period would be the feature in a struggling, needy 49ers defense.
The obvious eluded Hodes that day, though, and he said what pretty much anyone who doesn't really follow the draft and whose preparation for a column about it probably involved a quick scan of Mel Kiper's Big Board would have said: that Calvin Johnson, the media darling of the 2007 draft season, would win the offensive rookie of the year. Hey Hodes, it's okay, I am quite certain that Matt Millen thought the same thing, and he's only the worst general manager in NFL history.
To see the next pockmark on Hodes' "Toe to Toe" transcript, let me take you back to the first column of this winter, when we debated whether LSU or Ohio State would win the BCS title game. To this writer, it was relatively obvious that a talented Ohio State team that had played a soft schedule and wasn't used to competing against SEC athletes for an entire game -- in other words, the same Buckeye squad that was trounced by Florida just one year prior -- stood no chance. Not only did Hodes take the wrong side in the argument, he did so in a peculiarly incompetent fashion, telling us, in his closing points to simply "Ignore the disparity between the SEC and the Big Ten" because "Those are just excuses for people who want to ignore how dangerous Ohio State truly is." I think it's safe to say the outcome of the game -- more or less equivalent to Florida's drubbing of the Buckeyes in 2007 -- put that argument to rest. To make things even sweeter, just a couple of months later, Hodes gave me the privilege of sweeping Toe to Toe's 2008 title columns when he agreed to dub Memphis the eventual winner of the NCAA title. Good try, Alex.
In saving the best for last, I would like to remind everyone of our Pong vs. Beirut argument during Green Key 2007. As I said in the opening paragraph of my column, I admired Hodes for "having the courage to argue the notion that Beirut is superior to Pong." That's about all there was to admire about Alex that day, though, seeing as his argument for Beirut was about as nonsensical as it gets.
Among his primary lines of defense for Beirut that day was the following statement: "Why complicate things? Why create an environment conducive to injury? Why make skill a prerequisite for success? You shouldn't have to practice hitting spin serves for hours on end to remain competitive." Well Hodes, for most even modestly coordinated individuals, it's not necessary to toil for hours to refine a spin serve, but for a pong player such as yourself, whose game consists of a repeating series of clumsy and awkward gyrations, I guess it is. A word to the wise, though -- toil away refining your spin serve to your heart's content, but for your own sake, don't engage in that argument ever again. And if you do, try to make more sense next time.
Well, that concludes our "Toe to Toe" tenure. Hodes and I have disagreed, and contentiously so at times, but I guess that was what made the column fun. We've explored a wide range of topics, and it's been a pleasure establishing a column that (I'm told, at least) will live on even after Hodes and I leave the school.
Hope everyone has an enjoyable rest of the year. Keep it real.
