The major storylines: 1) The Detroit Pistons' run toward 70 victories. Yawn. Wake me when they reach 65. 2) Ron Artest is taking his crazy train to Sacramento? Too bad Doug Christie got traded. Artest could have gone into the stands and they could have fought to the death. 3) On that note, a player went into the stands, but didn't beat the living hell out of some drunkard. Where's the fun in that?
I was really only watching to see if Isiah Thomas gave Wilt Chamberlain's corpse a $70 million contract, and to keep up with the latest fashion and NBA dress-code-approved bling.
But then Kobe Bryant came along and changed everything. On Dec. 20, he scored 62 points ... in three quarters. With a chance at the non-Wilt scoring record (73 points, set by David Thompson in a desperate attempt to win the 1978 season scoring title), he sat out the fourth.
Idiotic, right? After pissing away his last chance at team glory by stabbing Shaq in the back in 2004, Kobe was now pissing away his only chance at individual fame. These things only happen once in a lifetime, right? Wrong. Last Sunday, he dropped 81 on the hapless Raptors. 81 points. Wow, right? It was unbelievable. Okay, I'll admit it. I only saw the highlights, but I'm sure the rest of the game was unbelievable too. 26-foot three-pointers? Hand in his face? No problem. He split double, triple, even a couple of quadruple teams. If they trapped him in the corners, he effortlessly drove baseline for reverse layups. Toronto could not have guarded him if they had brought fans in from the stands to pack their end of the court.
Reactions after the game were mixed. Some people gave the de rigueur "Wow!" response, but others saw another side. This group is best exemplified by the stunningly shameless Vince Carter, who told the Newark Star-Ledger, "The only bad thing about it is that younger kids, whose minds are easily warped, are going to think, 'Ohhh! I am going to go out there and do it instead of [honoring] the team concept first.' That is what is missing in the game, guys understanding how to play as a team."
Damn, Vince -- you've left me without the capacity for ridicule. Almost like those last few years in Toronto never happened, huh?
The man however, makes a point. Is this good for basketball? Purists, I'm sure, say no. Basketball is a team game, they'd whine, and look what this is doing to the team. Kobe is currently shooting 28 times a game. Kobe took 46 shots on Sunday. Yes, he made 61 percent of them, but for every Sunday, Kobe might put up a 7-27 or 12-35 night (like he did against the 76ers and Clippers, respectively).
So Kobe's taken ballhoggery to the next level. Lamar Odom finished Sunday's game 1-7. A known headcase, but arguably the Lakers' second best player, he's taking a career-low 11 shots a game and a record-high six bong rips a quarter. (Kobe's buying his chronic. It's all that keeps him from going postal on the court.) So Kobe is singlehandedly destroying team basketball.
But can you really blame Kobe? So he's not going to win the assist title this year. So what? The team is completely one dimensional. Beyond Kobe and Lamar, the Lakers' next scoring options are guys named Sasha and Smush. Why would Kobe ever pass? He's not going to win anyone over, so why not take every shot that comes his way?
I can't wait until he's triple-teamed, launching wild half-court shots every time he touches the ball, while "Zen Master" coach Phil Jackson beats himself to death with his clipboard. And honestly, wouldn't it be kind of fun if Lamar snapped one night and started blocking Kobe's shots, or tripping him every time they ran the pick and roll?
Or how about this amazing and equally plausible scenario: What if Kobe goes for 100? I might not even hate him anymore. Well, I probably still would. But still, I'm all for this new Kobe. Bottom line: say what you want, but that formerly alleged rapist can shoot.
