It would certainly be more difficult to explain why Gigli was produced and released than it would be to correctly pronounce the film's name (Gee-lee). This should-have-been-straight-to-video film fails in a profoundly memorable manner. After watching the film, one is left with a sincerely vexing question worthy of rumination: Which is worse, the "script" or the "acting"?
The incongruous plot denies the viewer of this movie any driblet of "willing suspension of disbelief" traditionally required to make someone consciously sit through such an extraordinarily implausible tale. The film's action turns around a third-rate thug's (Ben Affleck, who plays Larry Gigli) abduction of a mentally-challenged brother of a federal prosecutor. However, due to Gigli's historical ineptitude, a lesbian freelance rogue (Jennifer Lopez, who plays Ricki) is assigned to baby-sit the babysitter of the abductee. The result is a film devoid of drama, romance, action or comedy -- aside from the jokes I heard in the theater from other viewers while the film was shown.
Despite the all-too brief, yet charismatic appearances of Christopher Walken and Al Pacino, the film is beyond resuscitation. These entirely random appearances of Walken and Pacino fail to fill the problematic plot potholes. For example, Walken's character, a detective, appears only once in the film. Why? The story line is neither advanced nor developed by this distracting and inessential detour.
Pacino's new facial hair configuration and choice of retro-spectacles are more fascinating than the slow banter of dialogue in his scene. One is so divested in the film that one of the character's deaths in Pacino's scene only wakes up many of the sleeping members of the audience by the loud sound of a gun shot. Maybe this is the utility of the scene?
Even more disturbing than the disorderly directions of the film's contours is the ambiguous portrayal of lesbians. Lopez plays Ricki, a lesbian who ultimately falls for Affleck but who at no point in the film convincingly wrestles with bisexuality. The quixotic love-triangle suicide attempt of her former gay lover is so unreal that one gets restless. Gigli stretches the believability of Ricki's lesbianism more than Lopez stretches her body in a fairly arousing, but superfluous yoga scene.
Beyond the unconvincing lesbianism of Ricki, one is frequently annoyed by the crudely applied use of ancient wisdom. Jennifer Lopez citing Sun Tzu on The Art of War is exquisitely hilarious. Her character is an enigma of poor development, not of deep pensive philosophical reflection. Had Lopez resurrected her enticing performance in "Out of Sight," Gigli might not now be so far out of sight of the top 10 movies from this last weekend. Is it not embarrassing that Gigli just barely outperformed "From Justin to Kelly" on their respective opening weekends?
While Affleck has a history of accepting roles of uneven quality, Gigli required the method acting skills necessary to play Pee-Wee Herman. How is it possible for Affleck to win an Academy Award for Best Original Screenplay ("Good Will Hunting"), but apparently not notice how dreadfully awful the script for Gigli was? Was this just an opportunistic ploy to work with Jennifer Lopez?
The characters Affleck played in "Good Will Hunting," "The Sum of All Fears" and "Daredevil" should have be reincarnated in Larry Gigli. Instead, he's a mismatch of poor character traits from "Pearl Harbor," "Dogma" and"Armageddon ." Certainly, Gigli is no "Chasing Amy."
Affleck and Lopez have individually appeared in stellar movies in the past, but Gigli is an exception. The onscreen chemistry between Affleck and Lopez is insufficient to make water lukewarm. The romantic sequences in the film are only slightly more interesting than those of Barney and Betty Rubble in The Flintstones. One can only hope that the forthcoming "Jersey Girl" will be a better vehicle for showcasing Ben Affleck's and Jennifer Lopez's acting talents.
