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The Dartmouth
April 18, 2024 | Latest Issue
The Dartmouth

Unwelcome Abroad

To the Editor:

It's not just Prague. Silly, uneducated America-haters line the street of every country in the world. For thousands of dollars, you too can experience the thrill of being assaulted, menaced, spit on and tripped.

I encourage readers to travel to Madrid, Barcelona or Paris, all three of which are even closer than Prague. In each of these cities, the wandering American tourist can assure himself of encountering all of these perks, and usually within the span of 48 hours.

If you're really lucky (and the Parisian nightbus is a prime spot for this), be sure to take careful note of the screaming hordes of people who "hate Jews."