So have you heard? N'Sync will be appearing in "Star Wars Episode II: The Attack of the Clones."
I know what you're thinking. I feel the same way.
When I heard the news, I sat down and reflected on my feelings about N'Sync and "Star Wars" (in general -- not as a fusion of action and synchronized dancing, yet) in order to explain the rupture of disgust brewing in my stomach. I've never really been a die-hard fan of anything -- a groupie, an addict, a they-call-me-Penny-Lane kind of girl. But I do live in the moment and enjoy my surroundings, if you may. So if you asked me yesterday to choose between them, I would have chosen N'Sync.
I listen to N'Sync. I read Harry Potter. I bought a ticket to "Lord of the Rings." I watch "Survivor" and tape "Friends" every Thursday. (You see, these things will somehow be representative of Generation X in later years, and I intend to partake in some aspect of my generation -- unlike my anti-hippie parents.) I usually just go with the flow when it comes to pop culture, so the N'Sync craze is hard to avoid. They pop (please pronounce this word with the spunky high-pitched "pop" as the group did in their Billboard hit) around everywhere these days. Even into classic movies.
I can't help but squirm (and please stay aware of my being a pretty much indifferent fan of Star Wars up until today) when I hear the words N'Sync and "Star Wars" in the same sentence. Maybe it is not exactly the words that bother me, but the concepts they represent. And maybe not even the concepts but the people.
"Star Wars" is "sciencey." Scientific people like "Star Wars" -- and I don't mean people wearing white lab coats all day, but people who can appreciate the methodology behind things (good story plus talent plus adventure equals success).
There are those that are fanatical about "Star Wars," including some of my best friends. And I have always considered these "Star Wars" people odd. To me, they're in a class by themselves because it is just a story. And it is completely fake. But if they are willing to attend conventions and whatnot, I have to give them credit -- "Star Wars" has something special.
The books and movies captured millions of fans in the '70s. It's one of those movies to which people took their children, and that, in general, people liked. It had class and action and adventure. Throughout each decade, even more fans accumulated, including the children of the original fans.
I feel bad for the "Star Wars" people! For the parents who have been waiting 30 years and even more so for the zealots who have treasured the story for 30 years. Besides making "Episode 1" a disastrous semi-animated disappointment, George Lucas is making no effort to repair the damage by including N'Sync in the latest flick.
N'Sync fans and "Star Wars" fans do not get along; in fact, they hate each other. N'Sync is everything that "Star Wars" is not. They're new. They're hot. They're now. They attract the "non-scientific" people. They are just there, looking nice, adding background music to car rides and topping every "Best of 2001" music list. Everyone knows the words to their songs, but nobody respects their songs. People respect "Star Wars."
George Lucas is killing the "Star Wars" network that he created. People are losing faith. Even the non-scientific people, like myself, are capable of understanding this catastrophe. Attention George Lucas: You cannot include everyone. And even more importantly, you shouldn't include N'Sync just because they "are huge fans" and are famous and might attract 10-15-year-old girls. Show some pride in your work. Don't bring "Star Wars" down to our level. "Star Wars" is away -- away in another galaxy of good and evil. It's untouchable. And when we recognize pop faces in the background scenes, the magic will fizzle.
So I have decided to honor the "Star Wars" fans by boycotting the movie. I refuse to have N'Sync attract me to something that I shouldn't be a part of.
Bye Bye Bye, Mr. Lucas. You've gone too far. Even your non-fans are repulsed. I don't know whom you are trying to attract, but I can tell you this. It ain't gonna be me.
