Alice Gomstyn's August 6 article ("Study Shows Hook Ups Common") showed excellent insight into some of the concerns expressed in the Institute for American Values' report, "Hooking Up, Hanging Out, and Hoping For Mr. Right: College Women on Dating and Mating Today."
I would like to respond to Tom Dugdale '03's comment, "One of the tough things about [the hook up culture] is on the one hand you have a lot of women crying out, and on the other hand you have a lot of women partaking in this culture."
In 1997, the gender ratio among U.S. college students was 79 men to 100 women, a dramatic change from earlier eras. This shift causes a power shift; the lower number of men gives us control over gender relations, control that has apparently made us lazy. Of the college senior women interviewed for the report, a third said they had been asked out on two dates or fewer, and only half had been asked on six or more.
Unfortunately, many college men do not make that effort. Sixty-three percent of national survey respondents agreed: "There aren't many guys here who want a committed relationship."
I end this letter with two requests. To our elders, I ask that you not be afraid to offer guidance and support as we fumble through the remains of the courtship culture. To my fellow college-age men, I ask that you begin to or continue to make the effort. In the end, we'll be happier for it.
