A long time ago, I made a promise to myself that I would do a few things before I die. I made list of things -- some trivial, some stupid and many dangerous. I won't discuss all of my future plans, because some people may not be exactly pleased with my intentions.
No, I do not have a death wish, because I never expected to be harmed or die from doing the things on my list. Blessed with good genes, I've always believed that I would die of old age. I figured arthritis and diseases of old age might slow me down, so I decided to go through the list as quickly as possible.
I've always had a sense of immortality for a few reasons. Yes, I know how silly that sounds -- fine, I might have delusions. But I've been in over seven car accidents in my life and have even been hit by a car (I can almost hear the jokes from my friends telling me, "That explains a lot.") and lived to tell the tales. Those accidents range from minor fender-benders to crashing through the garage door and into the house. I've suffered no injuries whatsoever and survived all incidents unscathed.
Even harmful chemicals seem to have little effect on me. One day in my chemistry class, I was mixing a solution with a stirring rod. I had put some form of cyanide and some various acids into the flask and was lazily stirring the solution. I should mention that I have a habit of chewing on my pencils and pens. So I unconsciously stuck the stirring rod in my mouth until a burning sensation on the tongue reminded me that I was not chewing on a pencil. I don't remember exactly what happened afterwards, but I remember drinking a lot of grape juice.
After reading about a person who was trampled to death in a mosh pit at a Smashing Pumpkins concert, I added that activity to my list. Then I set out to look for the band's next concert in California. When my friends at the University of California at Berkeley told me of about the band's concert in San Francisco, we decided to go together. The next day, I drove to their apartment from Los Angeles. Yes, I was in a car accident, but it never went to court.
I've heard some wild stories about mosh pit accidents. A friend of mine claims to have gone into the mosh pit with a T-shirt but came out without a shirt. Some related stories involve people stabbing each other, and unsuspecting people being trampled to death. I've been at concerts with various mosh pits, but they were never really life-threatening. I looked forward to this one.
Although I wasn't stabbed, trampled or bodily harmed at the concert, it was exhilarating. I could understand how a person could die at their concerts. I had few minor bruises from being hit, but no serious injuries. The adrenaline rush was incredible, and I came out of the pit soaked in sweat (mostly other people's sweat) and with the distinct smell of marijuana. I crossed out another "stuff to do before I die" from the list.
Another truly stupid, pointless and potentially dangerous activity that was on my list was polar bear swimming. A bunch of East Coast people swimming in freezing water sounded as stupid and pointless as any other activity that I could think of. At the same time, it sounded like fun. So I joined the masses standing around Occom Pond for the Polar Bear Swim. Just think about it -- masses of half-naked people begging to jump into freezing water. When my turn came, I stripped and jumped in.
Have you seen that Michael Jordan commercial where everything goes really slowly as he dribbles and dunks the ball? It was kind of like that for me. I jumped into the freezing water and just before I actually hit the water, everything seemed to be going in slow motion. I was afraid yet excited. I could feel my body react in anticipation. I could almost hear my body telling my brain, "You idiot, what have you gotten us into now?!" As I hit the water, every cell in my body was screaming in shock, and I experienced a new level of coldness. I barely managed to climb out, and as I dried myself off, I mentally crossed off another item in my list.
The next thing on my list is to drive across the country. I've always wanted to do that. But my long-distance driving record is very shoddy, and the insurance company would kick me out if they learned I was planning to drive over 3,000 miles in a week. Other things I want to do are bit expensive, like learning to fly a plane, so I'm waiting until I have a job and enough money to hire some good lawyers before pursuing them. Maybe I'll learn to shoot rifles and go hunting...
