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Alternative Tour Guide Script

(05/08/17 5:24pm)

As the prospies swarmed our campus last month, I wondered if they actually were getting anything meaningful from these tours that continued to block my path through Baker-Berry Library. While hustling out of the grim Novack Café scene one day, I #overheard "This is Novack, the inspirational and collaborative hub on campus," and I almost spit out my beyond bland coffee and choked on my over-priced fruit snacks. That statement was almost as accurate as Dick’s House telling a friend she was pregnant because she came in looking for cough drops. So, for all those prospies looking for a ~real~ tour of Dartmouth, here you go:



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A Guide to Dartmouth Lingo

(04/14/17 3:28am)

For a freshman entering college for the first time, the adjustment from high school can often feel overwhelming. There are so many new experiences that it can be difficult to balance classes, social life and extracurricular activities. Some might argue that figuring out your future should be your priority at Dartmouth, but I would say that an equally (if not more) important task is keeping up with the lingo. No one liked having to ask their cool trip leader what getting “golden tree’d” is, and so to help our incoming ’21s maintain the illusion of not being the worst class ever, here is a quick guide to the Dartmouth slang they might encounter at Dimensions and beyond.