Forward Looking Reminiscence
This Green Key Weekend heralded in a new frame of reference for me, and I would be lying if I claimed it was not unbalancing.
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This Green Key Weekend heralded in a new frame of reference for me, and I would be lying if I claimed it was not unbalancing.
I want to make one thing clear right at the start -- I do not have a horse in the Alpha Epsilon Pi fraternity race. So my interest in reading about AEPi's second failed bid to win approval from the Interfraternity Council last week ("On Second Vote, IFC Denies AEPi Support," May 5) was purely voyeuristic.
By the time this op-ed goes to press, new Student Assembly leadership will have been elected. Just who will be in that leadership isn't certain as I write.
College is supposedly a place of learning. In the psychological sense, learning implies behavioral and cognitive modification, often as the result of experience and conditioning.
I have a confession to make: I've always been a little bit creeped out by those people who are absolutely certain about what they want to do.
I confess to being slightly amused -- and more than a little bit confused -- by the strong emotions that "Frat Free Friday" aroused among some students this past week.
In January 1941, speaking to Americans about the meaning of the world war that then engulfed the globe, President Franklin Delano Roosevelt tried to explain the purpose of waging such a destructive conflict. The terrible struggle was necessary, FDR said, to preserve four freedoms for mankind: freedom of speech and expression, freedom of worship, freedom from want and freedom from fear.
I hoped it would never come to this. I fear I may be turning into a broken record.
A funny thing happened this Saturday night: the New England Patriots lost.
Technology writers have likened the internet to the Wild West (it's an analogy I am not particularly fond of, for reasons that will become clear soon enough, but for the moment I will just run with it).
Before I begin, let me administer a little quiz. Given: carrots are vegetables. Given: carrots are orange.
David Stern, the commissioner of the NBA, recently proposed a dress code for his league's players. Stern said he may require business-casual attire at official NBA functions.
I'm going to start with a supposition that I think is eminently reasonable and work my way from there. If, at some point, you decide you disagree with the conclusions that I leap to, that's fine. You can disembark my train of thinking and we can part ways with no hard feelings.
Journalism is a rather arrogant profession. Journalists love to think of themselves as public servants, defending the helpless masses from the schemes of government, corporate America, organized religion, the military, special interests or any other convenient institutional boogeyman that is handy at the moment.
I'll start with a thought exercise: you are the owner of a widget store. For years and years, the golden widget has been one of your most popular products. You only keep a few golden widgets in stock, and they sell out each time you put them on the shelves. In fact, customers come in and ask for more golden widgets, even when there aren't any available. So now you're deciding how to change your widget store.
I am a Republican, and I love my party. And that is precisely why I believe that it's high time for Tom DeLay to step down as House majority leader.
I carry a little Swiss Army knife on my keychain -- I use it to open letters and packages and uncooperative shrink-wrapped consumer goods. The blade, just a tad over an inch long, has been dulled by these operations to the point where it takes some doing to cut things. The gooey residue from all the packing tape doesn't help either. So the chance that this knife is going to hurt anyone is essentially nil -- unless I accidentally stab myself someday while fighting with another shrink wrapper.
Back at the beginning of last month, I wrote that the NHL's owners and players seemed committed to a murder-suicide that meant the death of hockey in America. ("There is No Joy in Hockeytown," Feb. 8). Sure enough, in the weeks that followed, the NHL became the first of the big four sports leagues ever to cancel an entire season due to a labor dispute.
My memories from second grade are few and far between, but one episode that survives is the day my class watched a tragically bad educational video about the "essentials of living." I think the incident stands out because the video was narrated by a vaguely frightening ventriloquist's dummy that quizzed the young "contestants" on the video about rudimentary social studies knowledge.
Last week, when no one was looking, hockey crawled off into a nearby corner, curled up into a tiny ball and died. It died quietly and without fanfare. I died without notice, almost. Detroit noticed, and fans in Hockeytown shed some tears for the few TV cameras that bothered to watch. A few in New York, Philly and Colorado noticed, although there was nothing they could do. Canada noticed -- it is, after all, a country where hockey is the unofficial official sport.