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Earlier this week, I was texting my editors about trying to be better about turning in my articles on time. This is how it went: Me: I’ll try to get you my article on Tuesday. That work?Editor #1: Great, we’ll receive it Saturday then!Me: Wow you got me, good burn.Editor #2: Where the aloe at?
Need help drafting that perfect flitz? Have no fear, Dartbeat is here! Here are six different types of flitzes you’ll find in circulation that will help you craft your own. Get inspired and let your creative juices flow. Feel free to mix and match but remember that fortune favors the bold. Happy flitzing.
Find My Friends, aka the best app creation known to man, has steadily blossomed into a way for friends (and enemies) alike to track the every location, whereabouts and habits of anyone who you can get to share their location with you. Some people might be hesitant to join in the fun (is it creepy?), but let it be known that using Find My Friends is neither creepy nor invasive in any way. We've all had those desperate moments when we want food from Late Night but cannot bear to meander from the cozy comfort that is a dorm bed. No need to fear, though - hit up Find My Friends and extort that one softie you know will come through with Mac n' Cheese bites when you really need them. In addition to the classic food bearer, however, there are some other people you could really benefit from having on 24/7 location sharing - trust me:
Now that Easter and Passover are over, it’s time for the unholy holiday that everyone has been waiting for. We all know you’re going to ignore that New Hampshire is a little bit behind the times, so here are some ways to celebrate Hanover style.
Being extra is a way of life. It’s your own special way of living life to the fullest, the brightest, the most present way you can. Don’t ever let the haters get you down — you can never ever be too extra, and anyone who says you’re too much just isn’t enough. Always remember: If you’re not doing the most, you’re doing the least.
I don’t know about you guys, but 17W's Dartmouth Idol was probably the highlight of my day/week/month/year/life not only because of the insane talent, but also because of a couple cuties who, I swear, were singing directly to me. The life changing experience prompted the thought: What other reality TV shows could potentially thrive at Dartmouth?
There are two types of people in this world: those who are facetimey, and everyone else. Even when it seems like the entire campus and their prospies are in the KAF line post-10As or every machine in the gym is occupied, there are some elusive folks you just never see around. And, of course, your crush happens to be one of them.
Are you more of a Webster Ave. person than an East Wheelock St. person? Does your heart skip a beat when you see mac n cheese bites? Create your Saturday night and we’ll guess what your major is.
As seen time and time again, your zodiac sign is a valuable tool in assessing personality traits. With this zodiac test determining which 2000s Disney Channel show you’d be, based on your zodiac, you can rest assured that your personality is fully encapsulated by a Disney Channel Original Series.
Scientifically proven to be 100% accurate, and 100% delicious. Kind of.
College President Phil Hanlon lives a tough life. With his roles as a college administrator, prominent mathematician and side gig as an Alpha Delta legend in the flesh, our president has a lot on his plate. With President’s Day upon us, it’s time, we, as students, took some time out of our own lives to honor our dear leader. We cannot, of course, reach the levels of academic rigor that he espouses, nor can we achieve temperance of the sort he would like, but in his shadow we can grow to become the study beasts of PH77’s dreams.
It was quite the magical Big Weekend for 17W. Whether you had one too many (butter)beers or someone hit you with a Forgetfulness Charm (Obliviate!), there's a good chance you may not remember some of the questionable texts you sent. Luckily (or unluckily), Dartbeat has proven once again that the internet is forever and no Vanishing Charm can save you. Without further ado, we present: the best "Texts from Last Night" from Winter Carnival.
It’s Week 7, your midterms are looking a little grim, you keep falling asleep during your 10 and you’re starting to wonder why you ever thought higher education was worth it in the first place. Winter Carnival emails about Harry Potter aren’t helping, and suddenly you’re daydreaming about living it up with Harry at Hogwarts, learning how to fly on broomsticks and turn rats yellow (or trying to, anyway).
Given the theme of this year's Winter Carnival, you might have been hoping to snag some new Harry Potter accessories for your flair box. Unfortunately, you didn't win the (nonexistent) drawing for a $72 Deathly Hallow's necklace and you can't buy any new costumes because your Gringotts vault is out of DA$H. So, in celebration of Witchcraft, Blizzardry and being broke, here are some Pinterest-worthy (not really) ideas to help you make the most of what you’ve already got.
It can be hard being a freshman. Just look at them: so innocent, so soft, so silly. And Dartmouth can be a big, confusing place. The ’20s seem to live in a constant state of “the look on Will Ferrell’s face when Buddy the Elf first gets to New York City in the classic Christmas film ‘Elf.’”
With midterms coming at us full force, the stress on campus is palpable. Everyone has resorted to sweatpants, and the smallest things that don’t go your way may very well be the beginning of a spiral down to a deep dark place of failure. Here are a few #relatable Dartmouth things that probably stress you out even though they undoubtedly shouldn’t.
Recently inspired by Donald Trump’s use of ~alternative facts~, Dartbeat has compiled a list of alternative facts at Dartmouth. These are totally true, not at all false and completely factual statements about our magical life in warm, sunny Hanover. #fact
Is there something you can’t find at Dartmouth that you wish you could have? Ever thought about taking BorrowDirect for a spin to fulfill some of the many voids in your life?
There is no question that we live in a modern world of lies and deception. Thus, I do not see it as a coincidence that my editors — those powers that be, per se, spewing “alternative facts” upon the good people — have asked me to write an article about “Dartmouth conspiracy theories.” Nay, I say. I will be strong. I shall not fall victim to their whims. And in protest, I will write instead a list of the greatest truths at Dartmouth, indisputable by those who are not blinded by the corruption that plagues this very campus.