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Ah, Green Key. The one week a year every Dartmouth student — wait, did you just say WEEK? That is an example of one of the many questions freshman will be asking well … now. I for one thought this was just a two-day endeavor, but like most events on campus, why just stick to simplicity when you can pregame the pregame to the pregame three days before the pregame’s pregame? I have compiled a full-on itinerary for Green Key based on upperclassmen recommendations and realistic first-year expectations, along with a few tips to make sure you survive (key word here is survive, not thrive) the biggest event of the year. If you have no idea what to do with yourself between now and Sage the Gemini’s Grammy award-winning performance, fear not, just pull up your Google calendar and get ready to rage.
Ahhhh, college. Give a rouse for a liberal arts education and wholesome experiences that have the power to shape you as a person! However, have you ever wondered just how much these experiences have changed how you see the world? Fear not, for I can assure you that Dartmouth experiences have definitely changed you for the better.
Admittedly, I have yet to experience the disaster that will almost certainly be First-Year Family Weekend, but I’m excited by the fact that I won’t have to pay for nice meals, and I’m finding comfort in the odds that my parents probably won’t be the most embarrassing ones on campus. In speculating what types of parents mine are up against, here are a few that I know I’ll definitely see around:
It’s Friday night, and you find yourself on Webster Ave. after a treacherous week filled with overdue papers and late night “studying” on FFB. You enter the basement of Sigma Apple Pie with the hopes of releasing all your pent up angst with a paddle, ball and a few cups of Keystone Light™. Wading through a sea of crushed cups and empty beer cans, you situate yourself next to a frat bro at a table.
Grad student: “Sooo ... I missed the memo that it's illegal to drink on the Dartmouth Coach.” ’18 returning from off term: “Wait, why are there no napkins here…?”
Overheard in FFB: “I almost failed my driver’s test because I didn’t know what the stop sign was. They removed the word STOP so it was just a red octagon, and I was just like *shrugs*. I passed with the bare minimum.”
It was quite the magical Big Weekend for 17W. Whether you had one too many (butter)beers or someone hit you with a Forgetfulness Charm (Obliviate!), there's a good chance you may not remember some of the questionable texts you sent. Luckily (or unluckily), Dartbeat has proven once again that the internet is forever and no Vanishing Charm can save you. Without further ado, we present: the best "Texts from Last Night" from Winter Carnival.
With applications piling in, Dartmouth students of all grades have been testing their luck and hoping that they’ll be able to escape Hanover and study abroad. Whether you're an eager ’20 or an upperclassman who has had this idea in mind for a while, leaving the U.S. (or just the state of New Hampshire) is as exciting as it gets.
There you are. After nine (maybe?) months of apprehension, excitement and nerves, you are finally about to play your first game of pong. You feel adrenaline pumping through your veins with all the strength of watered-down Keystone, which you also happen to be standing in puddles of — gotta break in those frat shoes, am I right? As the moment finally arrives and the final cup in the game before yours is sunk, you’re suddenly nervous. What do you do? What should you expect? Luckily for you, we’ve compiled advice from some of the greatest pong champions this side of the Mississippi (and some from the other side too).
There are a lot of things to love about Dartmouth: Winter Carnival, chicken bobs from the HOP, and FFB, to name a few, but not much can compare to everyone’s favorite GPA-saver. That’s right, it’s your favorite day of the term — the deadline to NRO a class! What could be more exciting than the opportunity to avoid all consequences for your mistakes? In the spirit of today, I figured I’d share some tips on how to apply NROs to areas outside of your transcript … because we all know that a “C” isn’t the only thing you’d like to pretend never happened.