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Ever since the rogue snowstorm that has transformed Dartmouth back into a winter wonderland hell danger zone, the fact that we are actually finished with week one of spring term seems like a far-off fantasy. Some shed tears in hopes of sunshine and warmer weather, while others reminisce on the fresh, crisp pow that graced the slopes of ski mountains just a few short weeks ago. However, no matter the outlook, 17S has appeared to be more of a 17W 2.0 — so why not try and relive your best self – winter term is always a peak time — in what seems to be “50 Winter Terms”.
Student in Thayer: “I’ll just move to the Bay Area, find myself a bro-grammer and be a trophy wife.”
’19: “It’s a lot of effort to go to an event like that not drunk.” ’17: “It’s a lot of effort to do a lot of things not drunk.”
Feb. 17, 10:39 a.m., Dartmouth Outing Club: Safety and Security Officers and Hanover Fire Department responded to a call for assistance for a non-college affiliated person for a possible heart attack. The individual was transported to Dartmouth-Hitchcock Medical Center for treatment.
’19: “Playing shrub is like playing Quidditch with only two hoops.”’20 #1: “He just kept trying to kiss me over and over again”’20 #2: “Like a perpetual motion machine toward your face”’19 (Post-Super Bowl): "I tried to kick him out last night, but you can't remove someone from a three-person group message."’20: “Do you NOT know the term wall star?”
It was quite the magical Big Weekend for 17W. Whether you had one too many (butter)beers or someone hit you with a Forgetfulness Charm (Obliviate!), there's a good chance you may not remember some of the questionable texts you sent. Luckily (or unluckily), Dartbeat has proven once again that the internet is forever and no Vanishing Charm can save you. Without further ado, we present: the best "Texts from Last Night" from Winter Carnival.
Winter Carnival is over and it’s become painfully clear that it took all motivation on campus with it. I’m left with a lot of work and nothing to look forward to, so I’m choosing to deal with my problems through passionate and vehement denial. These are just a few ways I plan to relive Winter Carnival until 17W ends, and I strongly encourage you to join me.
Given the theme of this year's Winter Carnival, you might have been hoping to snag some new Harry Potter accessories for your flair box. Unfortunately, you didn't win the (nonexistent) drawing for a $72 Deathly Hallow's necklace and you can't buy any new costumes because your Gringotts vault is out of DA$H. So, in celebration of Witchcraft, Blizzardry and being broke, here are some Pinterest-worthy (not really) ideas to help you make the most of what you’ve already got.
'20: "I'm pissed about the napkins so last night I stole a dispenser from Collis when I was drunk."’19 #1: "If only he wasn't such a racist. Like, if he were a more covert racist I'd be okay with it."’19 #2: "Honestly, his racism is really overshadowed by his elitism."’19 #1: "Yeah, Champagne was like, his element."
Winter can be a tough time for everyone – it’s questionably too cold to go out (but everyone does it anyways), definitely too cold to be productive, and just cold enough that the ice sticks around and makes all of campus a hazard for treacherous falls. But don’t fret – there are so many ways to put your winter woes behind you and learn to truly ~thrive~ and not just survive 17W!