Honorable Mention: Three Up, Three Down

by Ray Lu | 5/7/18 2:20am

Trending Up

LeBron James

In Year 15, we are all still witnessing LeBron’s greatness. In the span of one short week, he completely turned around the Cleveland Cavaliers’ postseason trajectory and all but ended the one-seed Toronto Raptors’ dreams of making it out of the Eastern Conference.

Every game contains a glimmer of opportunity for Toronto, a lead or a strong individual performance, before LeBron emphatically shuts the door with another classic performance. The buzzer-beaters in this series alone will be played over and over again — ESPN’s SportsCenter Top 10 plays segment after Game Three was just 10 different angles of LeBron’s running, one-handed, game-winning, bank-shot floater. To quote the King, “Don’t try it at home.”

The GOAT conversation has never been so contentious, and if James drags this limp Cavs supporting cast to another title, history books may need a new chapter. If you’re not watching, you’re missing out. All due respect to an underrated Indiana Pacers team that took Cleveland to seven games.

Existentialism

Every week, I create a new document to type up my column and receive a stiff reminder of how much time has gone by in my senior spring. It’s the start of week 7. This is not a drill.

During my first two years at Dartmouth, my prioritization timeline was measured in years. If I missed out on something one term, there was always next term or even next year. When I was a junior, the timeline shrunk to days. I had to weigh the costs and benefits of, say, a weekend-long camping trip or a day’s journey to play mini-golf versus the equivalent amount of time spent on campus.

As a senior, everything is measured in hours, minutes even, and certain activities have shot to the very top of my priority list. While I previously felt as if I had virtually no time to do anything outside of school and extracurricular activities, nowadays I clear everything out of my schedule to attend lectures and my peers’ thesis presentations. I’m holding on to every last bit for dear life. Can you taste the increasing nostalgia in these columns?

“President Austin”

A CBS News video of an adorable four-year-old kid from Birmingham, Alabama has recently been making the rounds. Every week, Austin Perine dons a cape and transforms into his superhero alter ego, “President Austin,” whose superpower is delivering chicken sandwiches to homeless people in the area. Zooming around the streets, Austin enthusiastically greets strangers before offering them food from a large brown bag.

According to Austin’s father, Austin was inspired to create the alter ego after learning about homelessness while watching a television show about pandas, specifically how a mother panda abandoned its cub. Once Austin learned that people could be subject to the same circumstances, he asked his parents to divert his allowance and toy money to sandwiches for the homeless.

After President Austin delivers a sandwich, he reminds the recipient, “Don’t forget to show love.” We can all take a page out of President Austin’s book.

Trending Down

The Process

Shortly after I submitted my prediction that the Philadelphia 76ers would take down the Boston Celtics in six games, the Sixers were thrashed in a 16 point Game One loss. The Celtics then won the next two games by a combined eight points. Suddenly, “The Process” looks a lot less shiny than it did a week ago.

On paper, the Celtics are a higher-powered version of the impressive Pacers team we saw earlier this postseason, with several players capable of stepping up on any given night with solid playmaking and reliable defense. This Boston team is not only more talented than the Pacers — head coach Brad Stevens also seems to be every bit as much the whiz kid he was reputed to be when he was hired away from Butler University. Don’t forget that this team also has superstars Gordon Hayward and Kyrie Irving on the sideline due to injuries.

All things considered, however, it’s impressive that this young 76ers team looks this good this soon. Something tells me that a lot of growth is needed for this squad to be consistently impressive for long periods of time, but hopefully we’ll be seeing them deep into the postseason for years to come.

Kanye West

In five words: What is up with Kanye?

In 10 words: Is “Poop, poop” the greatest rap lyric of all time?

In 20 words: I have no sophisticated take on Kanye’s rants, but remember these moments when he inevitably runs for president in 2020.

Sunday

The Sunday after a darty-filled weekend is never good for campus library spaces or homework morale. See you in the stacks.